refuse to suffer her to say what she pleases of their families, without either returning her compliments, or withdrawing from her oratory; so that the poor woman has scarcely any society abroad, nor any conffort at home, and all through the sauciness of servants, and the unkindness of a husband that is so cruel to her, as to desire her to be quiet. But she is coming. I am in haste, sir, your humble servant,

NICHOLAS EARRING.'

'SIR,-I hope you will not endure this dumb club, for I am the unlucky spouse of one of those gentlemen: and when my dear comes from this joyless society, I am an impertinent, noisy rattle-snake, my maid is a saucy sow, the man is a thick-skull puppy, and founders like a horse; my cook is a tasteless ass; and if a child cry, the maid is a careless bear: If I have company, they are a parcel of chattering magpies: if abroad, I am a gaggling goose; when I return, you are a fine galloper; women, like cats, should keep the house. This is a frequent sentence with him. Consider some remedy against a temper that seldom speaks, and then speaks only unkindness. This will be a relief to all those miserable women who are married to the worst of tempers, the sullen, more especially to your distressed appellant,

GOODY DUMP.'

handsome!" Upon this we parted, and I resolved to take a little more air in the garden, yet avoid the danger, by casting my eyes downwards: but to my unspeakable surprise, I dis covered in the same fair creature, the finest ankle and prettiest foot that ever fancy imagined. If the petticoats, as well as the stays, thus diminish, what shall we do, dear Nestor? If it is neither safe to look at the head nor the feet of the charmer, whither shall we direct our eyes? I need not trouble you with any further description of her, but I beg you would consider that your wards are frail and mortal. Your most obedient servant, EPIMETRIUS.'

THE letters which I published in the Guardian of Saturday last, are written with such spirit and greatness of mind, that they had excited a great curiosity in my lady Lizard's family, to know what occasioned a quarrel betwixt the two brave men who wrote them; and what was the event of their combat. I found the family the other day listening in a circle to Mr. Wil'FRIEND NESTOR,-Our brother Tremble hav. liam, the templar, who was informing the ladies ing lately given thee wholesome advice con- of the ceremonies used in the single comb cerning tuckers, I send thee a word of counsel when the kings of England permitted such tria. touching thyself. Verily thou hast found great to be performed in their presence. He took o favour with the godly sisters. I have read in casion from the chance of such judicial pr that mysterious book called Æsop's Fables, how ceedings, to relate a custom used in a certai once upon a time an ass arrayed himself in the part of India, to determine lawsuits, which h skin of a lion, thereby designing to appear as produced as a parallel to the single combat. Th one of the mighty. But behold the vanity of custom is, "That the plaintiff and defendant a this world was found light, the spirit of untruth thrown into a river, where each endeavours became altogether naked. When the vainglo- keep under water as long as he is able; and rious animal opened his jaws to roar, the lewd who comes up first loses the cause.' The author voice of an ass braying was heard in the moun-adds, that if they had no other way of deciding tains. Friend, friend, let the moral of this sink controversies in Europe, the lawyers might e'en deep into thy mind; the more thou ponderest throw themselves in after them.' thereon, the fitter thou wilt become for the fellowship of the faithful. We have every day more and more hopes of thee; but between thee and me, when thou art converted thou must take to thee a scripture name. One of thy writing brethren bore a very good name, he was entitled Isaac, but now sleepeth. Jacob suiteth thy bookseller well. Verily Nestor soundeth Baby. lonish in the ears of thy well-wisher and constant reader, RUTH PRIM.

The third day of the week, profanely called Tuesday.'

'SIR,-Notwithstanding your grave advice to the fair sex not to lay the beauties of their necks so open, I find they mind you so little, that we young men are in as much danger as ever. Yesterday, about seven in the evening, I took a turn with a gentleman just come to town, in a public walk. We had not walked above two rounds, when the spark on a sudden pretended weariness, and as I importuned him to stay longer, he turned short, and pointing to a celebrated beauty: "What," said he, "do you think I am made of, that I should bear the sight of such snowy breasts! Oh, she is intolerably

The mirth occasioned by this Indian law did not hinder the ladies from reflecting still more upon the above-named letters. I found they had agreed, that it must be a mistress which caused the duel; and Mrs. Cornelia had already settled in her mind the fashion of their arms, their colours, and devices. My lady only asked with a sigh, if either of the combatants had a wife and children.

In order to give them what satisfaction I could, I looked over my papers; and though I could not find the occasion of the difference, I shall present the world with an authentic ac count of the fight, written by the survivor to a courtier. The gallant behaviour of the combatants may serve to raise in our minds a yet higher detestation of that false honour which robs our country of men so fitted to support and adorn it.

Sir Edward Sackville's relation of the fight be

twixt him and the lord Bruce.

'WORTHY SIR,-As I am not ignorant, so ought I to be sensible of the false aspersions some authorless tongues have laid upon me, in

the report of the unfortunate passage lately formed by sir John Heidon, it pleased the lord happened between the lord Bruce and myself, Bruce to choose my own, and then, past expectwhich, as they are spread here, so I may justly ation, he told him that he found himself so far fear they reign also where you are. There are behind-hand, as a little of my blood would not but two ways to resolve doubts of this nature; serve his turn; and therefore he was now reby oath or by sword. The first is due to magis. solved to have me alone, because he knew (for trates, and communicable to friends; the other I will use his own words) "that so worthy a to such as maliciously slander and impudently gentleman, and my friend, could not endure to defend their assertion. Your love, not my me- stand by and see him do that which he must, rit, assure me you hold me your friend, which to satisfy himself and his honour." Hereupon esteem I am much desirous to retain. Do me sir John Heidon replied, that such intentions therefore the right to understand the truth of were bloody and butcherly, far unfitting so nothat; and in my behalf inform others, who ble a personage, who should desire to bleed either are, or may be infected with sinister ru- for reputation, not for life; withal adding, he mours, much prejudicial to that fair opinion I thought himself injured, being come thus far, desire to hold amongst all worthy persons. And now to be prohibited from executing those hoon the faith of a gentleman, the relation I shall nourable offices he came for. The lord for give is neither more nor less than the bare answer, only reiterated his former resolutions; truth. The inclosed contains the first citation, whereupon, sir John leaving him the sword he sent me from Paris by a Scotch gentleman, who had elected, delivered me the other, with his delivered it to me in Derbyshire at my father- determinations. The which, not for matter, in-law's house. After it, follows my then an- but manner, so moved me, as though to my reswer, returned him by the same bearer. The membrance, I had not of a long while eaten next is my accomplishment of my first promise, more liberally than at dinner, and therefore being a particular assignation of place and unfit for such an action (seeing the surgeons weapons, which I sent by a servant of mine, by hold a wound upon a full stomach much more post, from Rotterdam, as soon as I landed there. dangerous than otherwise) I requested my seThe receipt of which, joined with an acknow-cond to certify him, I would presently decide ledgment of my too fair carriage to the de- the difference, and therefore he should presently ceased lord, is testified by the last, which periods meet me on horseback, only waited on by our the business until we met at Tergosa in Zea-surgeons, they being unarmed. Together we land, it being the place allotted for rendezvous; where he, accompanied with one Mr. Crawford, an English gentleman, for his second, a surgeon, and a man, arrived with all the speed he could. And there having rendered himself, I addressed my second, sir John Heidon, to let him understand, that now all following should be done by consent, as concerning the terms whereon we should fight, as also the place. To our seconds we gave power for their appoint-putation; I bade him alight, which, with all ments, who agreed we should go to Antwerp, from thence to Bergen-op-Zoom, where in the midway but a village divides the States' territories from the archduke's. And there was the destined stage, to the end that having ended, he that could, might presently exempt himself from the justice of the country, by retiring into the dominion not offended. It was farther concluded, that in case any should fall or slip, that then the combat should cease, and he whose ill fortune had so subjected him, was to acknow. ledge his life to have been in the other's hands. But in case one party's sword should break, because that could only chance by hazard, it was agreed that the other should take no advantage, but either then be made friends, or else upon even terms go to it again. Thus these conclusions being each of them related to his party, was by us both approved, and assented to. Accordingly we embarked for Antwerp. And by reason, my lord, as I conceive, because he could not handsomely, without danger or discovery, had not paired the sword I sent him to Paris; bringing one of the same length, but twice as broad; my second excepted against it, and advised me to match my own, and send him the choice, which I obeyed; it being, you know, the challenger's privilege to elect his weapon. At the delivery of the sword, which was per

rode, but one before the other, some twelve score, about two English miles: and then passion having so weak an enemy to assail, as my direction, easily became victor, and using his power, made me obedient to his commands. I being verily mad with anger the lord Bruce should thirst after my life with a kind of assuredness, seeing I had come so far and needlessly, to give him leave to regain his lost re

willingness he quickly granted, and there in a meadow, ankle deep in water at the least, bidding farewell to our doublets, in our shirts began to charge each other; having afore commanded our surgeons to withdraw themselves a pretty distance from us, conjuring them besides, as they respected our favours, or their own safeties, not to stir, but suffer us to execute our pleasures: we being fully resolved (God forgive us!) to despatch each other by what means we could; I made a thrust at my enemy, but was short, and in drawing back my arm I received a great wound thereon, which I interpreted as a reward for my short shooting; but in revenge I pressed in to him, though I then missed him also, and then received a wound in my right pap, which passed level through my body, and almost to my back. And there we wrestled for the two greatest and dearest prizes we could ever expect trial for, honour and life. In which struggling my hand having but an ordinary glove on it, lost one of her servants, though the meanest, which hung by a skin, and to sight yet remaineth as before, and I am put in hope one day to recover the use of it again. But at last, breathless, yet keeping our holds, there passed on both sides propositions of quitting each other's sword. But when ainity was dead, confidence could not live; and who should quit

first was the question; which on neither part reported of him in their parts, that he is silenced either would perform, and restriving again by authority; another informs me, that he hears afresh, with a kick and a wrench together, I he was sent for by a messenger, who had orders freed my long captivated weapon; which in- to bring him away with all his papers, and that continently levying at his throat, being master upon examination he was found to contain sestill of his, I demanded, if he would ask his life, veral dangerous things in his maw. I must not or yield his sword; both which, though in that omit another report which has been raised by imminent danger, he bravely denied to do. such as are enemies to me and my lion, namely, Myself being wounded, and feeling loss of blood, that he is starved for want of food, and that he having three conduits running on me, began to has not had a good meal's meat for this fortmake me faint; and he courageously persisting night. I do hereby declare these reports to be not to accord to either of my propositions; re- altogether groundless; and since I am contramembrance of his former bloody desire, and dicting common fame, I must likewise acquaint feeling of my present estate, I struck at his the world, that the story of a two hundred heart, but with his avoiding missed my aim, yet pound bank-bill being conveyed to me through passed through the body, and drawing through the mouth of my lion has no foundation of truth my sword re-passed' it through again, through in it. The matter of fact is this, my lion has another place; when he cried, "Oh, I am not roared for these twelve days past, by reason slain!" seconding his speech with all the force that his prompters have put very ill words in ' he had to cast me. But being too weak, after his mouth, and such as he could not utter with I had defended his assault, I easily became common honour and decency. Notwithstanding master of him, laying him on his back; when the admonitions I have given my correspondbeing upon him, I redemanded if he would re-ents, many of them have crammed great quanquest his life, but it seemed he prized it not at so dear a rate to be beholding for it, bravely replying, "he scorned it." Which answer of his was so noble and worthy, as I protest I could not find in my heart to offer him any more violence, only keeping him down until at length his surgeon afar off, cried out, "he would inmediately die if his wounds were not stopped." Whereupon I asked if he desired his surgeon should come, which he accepted of; and so being drawn away, I never offered to take his sword, accounting it inhuman to rob a dead man, for so I held him to be. This thus ended, I retired to my surgeon, in whose arms after I had remained a while for want of blood, I lost my sight, and withal as I then thought, my life also. But strong water and his diligence quickly recovered me, when I escaped a great danger. For my lord's surgeon, when nobody dreamt of it, came full at me with his lord's sword; and had not mine with my sword interposed himself, I had been slain by those base hands; although my lord Bruce, weltering in his blood, and past all expectation of life, conformable to all his former carriage, which was undoubtedly noble, cried out, "Rascal! hold thy hand." So may I prosper as I have dealt sincerely with you in this relation; which I pray you, with the inclosed letter, deliver to my lord chamberlain. And &c. Yours,

so,

tities of scandal down his throat, others have choked him with lewdness and ribaldry. Some of them have gorged him with so much nonsense that they have made a very ass of him. On Monday last, upon examining, I found him an arrant French tory, and the day after a virulent whig. Some have been so mischievous as to make him fall upon his keeper, and give me very reproachful language; but as I have promised to restrain him from hurting any man's reputation, so my reader may be assured that I myself shall be the last man whom I will suffer Lim to abuse. However, that I may give general satisfaction, I have a design of converting a roon in Mr. Button's house to the lion's library, in which I intend to deposit the several packets of letters and private intelligence which I do not communicate to the public. These manuscripts will in time be very valuable, and may afford good lights to future historians who shall give an account of the present age. In the mean while, as the lion is an animal which has a particular regard for chastity, it has been observed that mine has taken delight in.roaring very vehemently against the untuckered neck, and, as far as I can find by him, is still determined to roar louder and louder, until that irregularity be thoroughly reformed.

GOOD MR. IRONSIDE,-I must acquaint you, for your comfort, that your lion is grown a kind of bull-beggar among the women where I live. When my wife comes home late from cards, or commits any other enormity, I whisper in her ear, partly between jest and earnest, that "I will tell the lion of her." Dear sir, do not let them alone until you have made them put on their tuckers again. What can be a greater sign, that they themselves are sensible they have stripped too far, than their pretending to call a bit of linen which will hardly cover a silver groat, their modesty-piece? It is observed, that this modesty-piece still sinks lower and lower; and who knows where it will fix at last?

where the women show nothing but their eyes. Upon my return to England I was almost out of countenance to see my pretty country-women laying open their charms with so much liberality, though at that time many of them were concealed under the modest shade of the tucker. I soon after married a very fine woman, who always goes in the extremity of the fashion. I was pleased to think, as every married man must be, that I should make daily discoveries in the dear creature, which were unknown to the rest of the world. But since this new airy fashion is come up, every one's eye is as familiar with her as mine; for I can positively affirm, that her neck is grown eight inches within these three years. And what makes me tremble when I think of it, that pretty foot and ankle are now exposed to the sight of the whole world, which made my very heart dance within me, when I first found myself their proprietor. As in all appearance the curtain is still rising, I find a parcel of rascally young fellows in the neighbourhood are in hopes to be presented with some new scene every day.

'In short, sir, the tables are now quite turned upon me. Instead of being acquainted with her person more than other men, I have now the least share of it. When she is at home she is continually muffled up, and concealed in mobs, morning gowns, and handkerchiefs; but strips every afternoon to appear in public. For aught I can find, when she has thrown aside half her clothes, she begins to think herself half drest. Now, sir, if I may presume to say so, you have been in the wrong to think of reforming this fashion, by showing the immodesty of it. If you expect to make female proselytes, you must convince them, that if they would get husbands, they must not show all before marriage. I am sure, had my wife been dressed before I married her as she is at present, she would have satisfied a good half of my curiosity. Many a man has been hindered from laying out his money on a show, by seeing the principal figure of it hung out before the door. I have often observed a curious passenger so attentive to these objects which he could see for nothing, that he took no notice of the master of the show, who was continually crying out, "Pray, gentle. men, walk in."

'I have told you at the beginning of this let. ter, how Mahomet's she-disciples are obliged to cover themselves; you have lately informed us from the foreign newspapers of the regulations which the pope is now making among the Roman ladies in this particular; and I hope, our British dames, notwithstanding they have the finest skins in the world, will be content to show no more of them than what belongs to the face and to the neck, properly speaking. Their being fair is no excuse for their being naked.

'You know, sir, that in the beginning of last century, there was a sect of men among us, who called themselves Adamites, and appeared in public without clothes. This heresy may spring up in the other sex, if you do not put a timely stop to it, there being so many in all public places, who show so great an inclination to be Eveites. I am, sir, &c.' IF

A GOOD Conscience is to the soul what health is to the body; it preserves a constant ease and serenity within us, and more than countervails all the calamities and afflictions which can possibly befall us. I know nothing so hard for a generous mind to get over as calumny and reproach, and cannot find any method of quieting the soul under them, besides this single one, of our being conscious to ourselves that we do not deserve them.

I have been always mightily pleased with that passage in Don Quixote, where the fantastical knight is represented as loading a gentleman of good sense with praises and eulogiums. Upon which the gentleman makes this reflection to himself: How grateful is praise to human nature! I cannot forbear being secretly pleased with the commendations I receive, though I am sensible it is a madman that bestows them on me. In the same manner, though we are often sure that the censures which are passed upon us are uttered by those who know nothing of us, and have neither means nor abilities to form a right judgment of us, we cannot forbear being grieved at what they say.

In order to heal this infirmity, which is so natural to the best and wisest of men, I have taken a particular pleasure in observing the conduct of the old philosophers, how they bore themselves up against the malice and detraction of their enemies.

The way to silence calumny, says Bias, is to be always exercised in such things as are praiseworthy. Socrates, after having received sentence, told his friends, that he had always accustomed himself to regard truth and not censure, and that he was not troubled at his condemnation, because he knew himself free from guilt. It was in the same spirit that he heard the accusations of his two great adver saries, who had uttered against him the most virulent reproaches. Anytus and Melitus, says he, may procure sentence against me, but they cannot hurt me. This divine philosopher was so well fortified in his own innocence, that he neglected all the impotence of evil tongues which were engaged in his destruction. This was properly the support of a good conscience, that contradicted the reports which had been raised against him, and cleared him to himself.

Others of the philosophers rather choose to retort the injury by a smart reply, than thus to disarm it with respect to themselves. They show that it stung them, though at the same time they had the address to make their aggres. sors suffer with them. Of this kind was Aristotle's reply to one who pursued him with long and bitter invectives. You,' says he, who are used to suffer reproaches, utter them with delight; I who have not been used to utter them take no pleasure in hearing them.' Diogenes was still more severe on one who spoke ill of him: "Nobody will believe you when you speak

ill of me, any more than they would believe me should I speak well of you.'

proaching joy. It shall bid his soul go out of the body undauntedly, and lift up his head with confidence before saints and angels. Surely the comfort which it conveys at this season, is something bigger than the capacities of mortality, mighty and unspeakable, and not to be understood until it comes to be felt.

him; and in a word, all things conspire to make his sick bed grievous and uneasy; nothing can In these, and many other instances I could then stand up against all these ruins, and speak produce, the bitterness of the answer sufficiently life in the midst of death, but a clear conscience. testifies the uneasiness of mind the person was And the testimony of that shall make the under who made it. I would rather advise my comforts of heaven descend upon his weary reader, if he has not in this case the secret con-head, like a refreshing dew, or a shower upon solation, that he deserves no such reproaches as a parched ground. It shall give him some liveare cast upon him, to follow the advice of Epic-ly earnests, and secret anticipations of his aptetus: If any one speaks ill of thee, consider whether he has truth on his side; and if so, reform thyself, that his censures may not affect thee.' When Anaximander was told, that the very boys laughed at his singing; Ay,' says he, then I must learn to sing better.' But of all the sayings of philosophers which I have gathered together for my own use on this occasion, there are none which carry in them more candour and good sense than the two following ones of Plato. Being told that he had many enemies who spoke ill of him; It is no matter,' said he, I will live so that none shall believe them.' Hearing at another time that an intimate friend of his had spoken detractingly of him; I am sure he would not do it,' says he, if he had not some reason for it.' This is the surest as well as the noblest way of drawing the sting out of a reproach, and a true method of preparing a man for that great and only relief against the pains of calumny, a good conscience.'

I designed in this essay to show that there is no happiness wanting to him who is possessed of this excellent frame of mind, and that no person can be miserable who is in the enjoyment of it: but I find this subject so well treated in one of Dr. South's sermons, that I shall fill this Saturday's paper with a passage of it, which cannot but make the man's heart burn within him, who reads it with due attention.

That admirable author, having shown the virtue of a good conscience in supporting a man under the greatest trials and difficulties of life, concludes with representing its force and efficacy in the hour of death.

The third and last instance in which, above all others, this confidence towards God does most eminently show and exert itself, is at the time of death; which surely gives the grand op. portunity of trying both the strength and worth of every principle. When a man shall be just about to quit the stage of this world, to put off his mortality, and to deliver up his last accounts to God; at which sad time his memory shall serve him for little else but to terrify him with a frightful review of his past life, and his former extravagances stripped of all their pleasure, but retaining their guilt: what is it then that can promise him a fair passage into the other world, or a comfortable appearance before his dreadful Judge when he is there? Not all the friends and interests, all the riches and honours under heaven, can speak so.much as a word for him, or one word of comfort to him in that condition; they may possibly reproach, but they cannot relieve him.

No, at this disconsolate time, when the busy tempter shall be more than usually apt to vex and trouble him, and the pains of a dying body to hinder and discompose him, and the settle. ment of worldly affairs to disturb and confound

And now, who would not quit all the pleasures, and trash, and trifles, which are apt to captivate the heart of man, and pursue the greatest rigours of piety, and austerities of a good life, to purchase to himself such a conscience, as at the hour of death, when all the friendship in the world shall bid him adieu, and the whole creation turn its back upon him, shall dismiss the soul and close his eyes with that blessed sentence, "well done, thou good and faithful servant, enter thou into the joy of thy Lord!"

SOME of our quaint moralists have pleased themselves with an observation, that there is but one way of coming into the world, but a thousand to go out of it. I have seen a fanciful dream written by a Spaniard, in which he introduces the person of Death metamorphosing himself, like another Proteus, into innumerable shapes and figures. To represent the fatality of fevers and agues, with many other distempers and accidents that destroy the life of man, Death enters first of all in a body of fire; a little after he appears like a man of snow, then rolls about the room like a cannon-ball, then lies on the table like a gilded pill; after this he transforms himself of a sudden into a sword, then dwindles successively to a dagger, to a bodkin, to a crooked pin, to a needle, to a hair. The Spaniard's design by this allegory, was to show the many assaults to which the life of man is exposed, and to let his reader see that there was scarce any thing in nature so very mean and inconsiderable, but that it was able to overcome him, and lay his head in the dust. I remember monsieur Pascal, in his reflections on Providence, has this observation upon Cromweli's death. That usurper, says he, who had destroyed the royal family in his own nation, who had made all the princes of Europe tremble, and struck a terror into Rome itself, was at last taken out of the world by a fit of the gravel. An atom, a grain of sand, says he, that would have been of no significancy in any other part of the universe, being lodged in such a particular