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assistance, a very hopeful young gentleman, | tleman, 'that the high names which are used my relation, who is to be called to the bar with- among us with so great veneration, were no in a year and a half at farthest, told me, that he other than stage-fighters, and worthics of the had ever since I first mentioned duelling, turned ancient bear-garden. The renowned Hercules his head that way; and that he was principally always carried a quarterstaff, and was from moved thereto, because he designed to follow thence called Claviger.* A learned chronolothe circuits in the north of England and south gist is about proving what wood this staff was of Scotland, and to reside mostly at his own es. made of, whether oak, ash, or crab-tree. The tate at Landbadernawz* in Cardiganshire. The first trial of skill he ever performed was with northern Britons and the southern Scots are a one Cacus, a deer-stealer; the next was with warm people, and the Welsh a nation of gen- Typhonus, a giant of forty feet four inches. tlemen; so that it behoved him to understand Indeed it was unhappily recorded, that meeting well the science of quarrelling. The young at last with a sailor's wife, she made his staff gentleman proceeded admirably well, and gave of prowess serve her own use, and dwindle away the board an account that he had read Fitz- to a distaff; she clapped him on an old tar jacket herbert'st Grand Abridgiment,' and had found of her husband; so that this great hero drooped that duelling is a very ancient part of the law; like a scabbed sheep. Him his contemporary for when a man is sued, be it for his life or his Theseus succeeded in the bear-garden, which land, the person that joins the issue, whether honour he held for many years. This grand plaintiff or defendant, may put the trial upon duellist went to hell, and was the only one of the duel. Further he argued, under favour of that sort that ever came back again. As for the court, that when the issue is joined by the Achilles and Hector (as the ballads of those duel, in treason or other capital crimes, the times mention,) they were pretty smart fellows; parties, accused and accuser, must fight in they fought at sword and buckler; but the fortheir own proper persons: but if the dispute be mer had much the better of it; his mother, who for lands, you may hire a champion at Hockley was an oyster-woman, having got a blacksmith in the Hole, or any where else. This part of of Lemnos to make her son's weapons. There the law we had from the Saxons; and they had is a pair of trusty Trojans in a song of Virgil it, as also the trial by ordeal, from the Lapland- that were famous for handling their gauntlets, ers. It is indeed agreed, said he, the southern Dares and Entellus; and indeed it does appear, and eastern nations never knew any thing of they fought no sham-prize.' it; for though the ancient Romans would scold and call names filthily, yet there is not an example of a challenge that ever passed among them.

His quoting the eastern nations, put another gentleman in mind of an account he had from a boatswain of an East-Indiaman; which was, that a Chinese had tricked and bubbled him, and that when he came to demand satisfaction the next morning, like a true tar of honour, called him a son of a whore, liar, dog, and other rough appellatives used by persons conversant with winds and waves; the Chinese, with great tranquillity, desired him not to come abroad fasting, nor put himself into a heat, for it would prejudice his health.' Thus the east knows nothing of this gallantry.

There sat at the left of the table a person of a venerable aspect, who asserted, that half the impositions which are put upon these ages have been transmitted by writers who have given too great pomp and magnificence to the exploits of the ancient bear-garden, and made their gladiators, by fabulous tradition, greater than Gormant and others of Great Britain.' He informed the company, that he had searched authorities for what he said, and that a learned antiquary, Humphrey Scarecrow, esquire, of Hockley in the Hole, recorder to the bear-garden, was then writing a discourse on the subject. It appears by the best accounts,' says this

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*There is no such place. It is probable Llanbadern Vawr in Cardiganshire is intended.

† A book published under this title in 1516 by Anthony Fitzherbert, one of the judges in the reign of Henry VIII. This author died in 1532.

[Gorman is mentioned in the epilogue to Lansdowne's 'Jew of Venice, and is there explained to have been a prize-fighter.

The Roman bear-garden was abundantly more magnificent than any thing Greece could boast of: it flourished most under those delights of mankind, Nero and Domitian. At one time it is recorded, four hundred senators entered the list, and thought it an honour to be cudgelled and quarterstaffed. I observe the Lanistæ were the people chiefly employed, which makes me imagine our bear-garden copied much after this, the butchers being the greatest men in it.

Thus far the glory and honour of the beargarden stood secure, until fate, that irresistible ruler of sublunary things, in that universal ruin of arts, and politer learning, by those savage people the Goths and Vandals, destroyed and levelled it to the ground. Then fell the grandeur and bravery of the Roman state, until at last the warlike genius (but accompanied with more courtesy) revived in the Christian world under those puissant champions, Saint George, Saint Dennis, and other dignified heroes: one killed his dragon, another his lion, and were all afterwards canonized for it, having red letters† before them to illustrate their martial temper. The Spanish nation, it must be owned, were devoted to gallantry and chivalry above the rest of the world. What a great figure does that great name, Don Quixote, make in history! How shines this glorious star in the western world! O renowned hero! O mirror of knighthood!

Thy brandished whinyard all the world defies,
And kills as sure as del Tobosa's eyes.

I am forced to break off abruptly, being sent for in haste with my rule, to measure the degree

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of an affront, before the two gentlemen (who are now in their breeches and pumps ready to engage behind Montague-house) have made a

pass.

From my own Apartment, June 18.

It is an unreasonable objection, I find, against my labours, that my stock is not all my own, and, therefore, the kind reception I have met with, is not so deserved as it ought to be. But I hope, though it be never so true that I am obliged to my friends for laying their cash in my hands, since I give it them again when they please, and leave them at their liberty to call it home, it will not hurt me with my gentle readers. Ask all the merchants who act upon consignments, where is the necessity (if they answer readily what their correspondents draw) of their being wealthy themselves? Ask the greatest bankers, if all the men they deal with were to draw at once, what would be the consequence? But indeed a country friend has writ me a letter which gives me great mortification; wherein I find I am so far from expecting a supply from thence, that some have not heard of me, and the rest do not understand me: his epistle is as follows.

DEAR COUSIN,-I thought when I left the town, to have raised your fame here, and helped you to support it by intelligence from hence; but, alas! they had never heard of the Tatler until I brought down a set. I lent them from house to house, but they asked me what they meant. I began to enlighten them, by telling who and who were supposed to be intended by the characters drawn. I said, for instance, Chloe and Clarissa are two eminent toasts.

A gen

tleman who keeps his greyhound and gun, and one would think might know better, told me, he supposed they were Papishes, for their names were not English. Then,' said he, "why do you call live people toasts?' I answered, That was a new name found out by the wits, to make a lady have the same effect, as burridge in the glass when a man is drinking. But, says I, sir, I perceive this is to you all bamboozling; why, you look as if you were Don Diego'd to the tune of a thousand pounds.' All this good language was lost upon him: he only stared, though he is as good a scholar as any layman in the town, except the barber. Thus, cousin, you must be content with London for the centre of your wealth and fame; we have no relish for you. Wit must describe its proper circumfer. ence, and not go beyond it, lest, like little boys when they straggle out of their own parish, it may wander to places where it is not known, and be lost. Since it is so, you must excuse me, that I am forced at a visit to sit silent, and only lay up what excellent things pass at such con

versations.

'This evening I was with a couple of young ladies; one of them has the character of the prettiest company, yet really I thought her but silly; the other, who talked a great deal less, I observed to have understanding. The lady, who is reckoned such a companion among her acquaintance, has only, with a very brisk air, a

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knack of saying the commonest things: the other, with a sly serious one, says home things enough. The first, mistress Giddy, is very quick; but the second, mistress Slim, fell into Giddy's own style, and was as good company as she. Giddy happens to drop her glove; Slim reaches it to her. Madam,' says Giddy, I hope you will have a better office.' Upon which Slim immediately repartees, and sits in her lap, and cries, Are you not sorry for my heavi ness?' The sly wench pleased me, to see how she hit her height of understanding so well. We sat down to dinner. Says Giddy, mighty prettily, Two hands in a dish, and one in a purse.' Says Slim, Ay, madam, the more the merrier; but the fewer the better cheer.' I quickly took the hint, and was as witty and talkative as they. Says I, He that will not when he may, When he will, he shall have nay.

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and so helped myself. Giddy turns about 'What, have you found your tongue? Yes,' says I, it is manners to speak when I am spoken to; but your greatest talkers are the least doers, and the still sow eats up all the broth.' 'Ha! ha!' says Giddy, one would think he had nothing in him, and do you hear how he talks, when he pleases I grew immediately roguish and pleasant to a degree, in the same strain. Slim, who knew how good company we had been, cries, You will certainly print this bright conversation.'

'It is so; and hereby you may see how small an appearance the prettiest things said in company make, when in print.'

St. James's Coffee-house, June 20.

A mail from Lisbon has brought advices, of June the twelfth, from the king of Portugal's army encamped at Torre Allegada, which inform us, that the general of the army called a court-martial on the fourth at the camp of Jerumena, where it was resolved to march with a design to attempt the succour of Olivenza. Accordingly the army moved on the fifth, and marched towards Badajos. Upon their approach, the marquis de Bay detached so great a party from the blockade of Olivenza, that the marquis das Minas, at the head of a large detachment, covered a great convoy of provisions towards Olivenza, which threw in their stores, and marched back to their army, without molestatation from the Spaniards. They add, that each army must necessarily march into quarters within twenty days.

Whosoever can discover a surgeon's appren. tice who fell upon Mr. Bickerstaff's messenger, or (as the printers call him) Devil, going to the press, and tore out of his hand part of his essay against duels, in the fragments of which were the words you lie,' and 'man of honour,' taken up at the Temple-gate, and the words, perhaps,'

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may be not,'-' by your leave, sir,'-and other terms of provocation, taken up at the door of Young Man's Coffee-house, shall receive satisfaction from Mr. Morphew, besides a set of arguments to be spoken to any man in a passion, which, if the said enraged man listens to, will prevent quarrelling.

Mr. Bickerstaff does hereby give notice the rack and the torture, only to convince her, that he has taken the two famous Universities she has really fine limbs, without spoiling or of this land under his immediate care, and does hereby promise all tutors and pupils, that he will hear what can be said of each side between them, and to correct them impartially, by placing them in orders and classes in the learned world, according to their merit.

Mr. Bickerstaff has received the advices from Clay-hill, which, with all intelligence from honest Mr. Sturdy and others, shall have their place in our future story.

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As answer to the following letter being absolutely necessary to be despatched with all expedition, I must trespass upon all that come with horary questions into my antichamber, to give the gentleman my opinion.

To Isaac Bickerstaff, Esquire.

June 18, 1709.

distorting them. I expect your directions, be-
fore I proceed to dwindle and fall away with
despair; which at present I do not think advise.
able, because, if she should recant, she may
then hate me perhaps, in the other extreme, for
my tenuity. I am (with impatience) your most
humble servant,
'CHARLES STURDY.'

My patient has put his case with very much warmth, and represented it in so lively a manner, that I see both his torment and tormentor with great perspicuity. This order of Platonic ladies are to be dealt with in a manner peculiar from all the rest of the sex. Flattery is the general way, and the way in this case; but it is not to be done grossly. Every man that has wit, and humour, and raillery, can make a good flatterer for women in general: but a Platonne is not to be touched with panegyric: she will tell you, it is a sensuality in the soul to be delighted that way. You are not therefore to commend, but silently consent to all she does and says. You are to consider, in her the scorn of you is not humour, but opinion.

·

this was no place for him or his companions, up goes my grave impudence to the maid; Young woman,' said he, if any of the ladies are in the way on this side of the house, pray carry us on the other side towards the gardens: we are, you must know, gentlemen that are travelling England; after which we shall go into foreign parts, where some of us have already been.' Here he bows in the most humble man

There were, some years since, a set of these ladies who were of quality, and gave out, that virginity was to be their state of life during this mortal condition, and therefore resolved to join their fortunes, and erect a nunnery. The 'SIR,-I know not whether you ought to pity place of residence was pitched upon; and a or laugh at me; for I am fallen desperately in pretty situation, full of natural falls and risings love with a professed Platonne, the most unac- of waters, with shady coverts, and flowery arcountable creature of her sex. To hear her talk bours, was approved by seven of the founders. seraphics, and run over Norris, and More, and There were as many of our sex who took the Milton, and the whole set of intellectual triflers, liberty to visit their mansions of intended setorments me heartily; for, to a lover who un- verity; among others, a famous rake of that derstands metaphors, all this pretty prattle of time, who had the grave way to an excellence. ideas gives very fine views of pleasure, which He came in first; but, upon seeing a servant only the dear declaimer prevents, by understand-coming towards him, with a design to tell him ing them literally: why should she wish to be a cherubim, when it is flesh and blood that make her adorable? If I speak to her, that is a high breach of the idea of intuition. If I offer at her hand or lip, she shrinks from the touch like a sensitive plant, and would contract herself into mere spirit. She calls her chariot, vehicle; her furbelowed scarf, pinions; her blue mantua and petticoat is her azure dress; and her footman goes by the name of Oberon. It is my misfor-ner, and kissed the girl, who knew not how to tune to be six feet and a half high, two full spans between the shoulders, thirteen inches diameter in the calves; and, before I was in love, I had a noble stomach, and usually went to bed sober with two bottles. I am not quite six-and-twenty, and my nose is marked truly aquiline. For these reasons, I am in a very particular manner her aversion. What shall I do? Impudence itself cannot reclaim her. If I write miserably, she reckons me among the children of perdition, and discards me her region; if I assume the gross and substantial, she plays the real ghost with me, and vanishes in a moment. I had hopes in the hypocrisy of her sex; but perseverance makes it as bad as fixed aversion. I desire your opinion, whether I may not lawfully play the inquisition upon her, make use of a little force, and put her to

6

behave to such a sort of carriage. He goes on: 'Now, you must know, we have an ambition to have it to say, that we have a protestant nunnery in England: but pray Mrs. Betty'—' Sir,' she replied, my name is SUSAN, at your service.' Then I heartily beg your pardon'-' No offence in the least,' said she, for I have a cousin-german, whose name is Betty.' 'Indeed,' said he I protest to you, that was more than I knew; I spoke at random: but since it happens that I was near in the right, give me leave to present this gentleman to the favour of a civil salute.' His friend advances, and so on, until they had all saluted her. By this means the poor girl was in the middle of the crowd of these fellows,

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* It is said, that Mr. Repington, a Warwickshire wag, was the famous rake here alluded to.

of a pious thought, you deceive yourself in wishing an institution foreign to that of Providence. These desires were implanted in us for reverend purposes, in preserving the race of men, and giving opportunities for making our chastity more heroic.' The conference was continued in this celestial strain, and carried on so well by the managers on both sides, that it created a second and a third interview; and, without entering into further particulars, there was hardly one of them but was a mother or father that day twelvemonth.*

Any unnatural part is long taking up and as long laying aside; therefore Mr. Sturdy may assure himself, Platonica will fly for ever from a forward behaviour; but if he approaches her according to this model, she will fall in with the necessities of mortal life, and condescend to look with pity upon an unhappy man, imprisoned in so much body, and urged by such violent desires.

From my own Apartment, June 22.

at a loss what to do, without courage to pass through them; and the Platonics, at several peep-holes, pale, trembling, and fretting. Rake perceived they were observed, and therefore took care to keep Sukey in chat with questions concerning their way of life; when appeared at last Madonella, a lady who had writ a fine book concerning the recluse life, and was the projectrix of the foundation. She approaches into the hall; and Rake, knowing the dignity of his own mien and aspect, goes deputy from his company. She begins, Sir, I am obliged to follow the servant, who was sent out to know what affair could make strangers press upon a solitude which we, who are to inhabit this place, have devoted to heaven and our own thoughts?' 'Madam,' replies Rake, with an air of great distance, mixed with a certain indifference, by which he could dissemble dissimulation, your great intention has made more noise in the world than you design it should; and we travellers, who have seen many foreign institutions of this kind, have a curiosity to see, in its first rudiments, the seat of primitive piety; for such The evils of this town increase upon me to it must be called by future ages, to the cternal honour of the founders; I have read Madonella's so great a degree, that I am half afraid I shall excellent and seraphic discourse on this subject.' not leave the world much better than I found The lady immediately answered, If what Iit. Several worthy gentlemen and critics have have said could have contributed to raise any mity which has been revived, after being long applied to me, to give my censure of an enor thoughts in you that may make for the advancement of intellectual and divine conversation, I suppressed, and is called punning. I have seshould think myself extremely happy. He veral arguments ready to prove, that he cannot be a man of honour, who is guilty of this abuse immediately fell back with the profoundest veneration; then advancing, 'Are you then that of human society. But the way to expose it admired lady? If I may approach lips which is, like the expedient of curing drunkenness, have uttered things so sacred.-He salutes her. showing a man in that condition; therefore I must give my reader warning, to expect a colHis friends followed his example. The devoted within stood in amazement where this would lection of these offences; without which preend, to see Madonella receive their address paration, I thought it too adventurous to introand their company. But Rake goes on-Weduce the very mention of it in good company; would not transgress rules; but if we may take the liberty to see the place you have thought fit to choose for ever, we would go into such parts of the gardens, as is consistent with the severities you have imposed on yourselves.'

To be short, Madonella permitted Rake to lead her into the assembly of nuns, followed by his friends, and each took his fair-one by the hand, after due explanation, to walk round the gardens. The conversation turned upon the lilies, the flowers, the arbours, and the growing vegetables; and Rake had the solemn impudence, when the whole company stood round him, to say, that he sincerely wished men might rise out of the earth like plants; and that our minds were not of necessity to be sullied with carnivorous appetites for the generation, as well as support, of our species.' This was spoken with so easy and fixed an assurance, that Madonella answered, 'Sir, under the notion

*The person here represented, or rather greatly misrepresented, under the name of Madonella, a diminutive

from Madona, which signifies the Virgin Mary, was Mrs. Mary Astell, a lady of superior understanding, of considerable learning, and singular piety. She was the daughter of a merchant in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, where she was born about 1668, and lived about twenty years. The remainder of her inoffensive, irreproachable, and exemplary life she spent at London and Chelsea, where she died in 1731.

† An allusion to, or rather a quotation from, sir T. Brown's Religio Medici.'

and I hope, I shall be understood to do it, as a divine mentions oaths and curses only for their condemnation. I shall dedicate this discourse to a gentleman, my very good friend, who is the Janust of our times, and whom, by his years and wit, you would take to be of the last age; but by his dress and morals, of this.

St. James's Coffee-house, June 22.

Last night arrived two mails from Holland, which bring letters from the Hague of the twenty-eighth instant, N. S. with advice, that the enemy lay encamped behind a strong retrenchment, with the marsh of Romiers on their right and left, extending itself as far as Bethune; La Basse is in their front, Lens in their rear, and their camp is strengthened by another line from Lens to Douay. The duke of Marlborough caused an exact observation to be made of their ground, and the works by which they were covered, which appeared so strong, that it was not thought proper to attack them in their present posture. However the

*This is mere fiction, and unpardonable, as it seems to imply an oblique censure on Mrs. Astell, of a nature totally repugnant to her eminently virtuous and respectable character.

Under the fanciful name of Janus, Steele clearly al ludes to Swift, the real author of the preceding part of this paper, and pays him some compliments in return ↑ for his communication.

duke thought fit to make a feint as if he de- | wittiest of them all marry one day or other, it signed it; his grace accordingly marched from is impossible to believe, that if a man thought the abbey at Looze, as did prince Eugene from he should be for ever incapable of being received Lampret, and advanced with all possible dili- by a woman of merit and honour, he would gence towards the enemy. To favour the ap- persist in an abandoned way; and deny himself pearance of an intended assault, the ways were the possibility of enjoying the happiness of wellmade, and orders distributed in such manner, governed desires, orderly satisfactions, and hothat none in either camp could have thoughts nourable methods of life. If our sex were wise, of any thing but charging the enemy by break a lover should have a certificate from the last of day next morning; but soon after the fall woman he served, how he was turned away, beof the night of the twenty-sixth, the whole army fore he was received into the service of another: faced towards Tournay, which place they in- but at present any vagabond is welcome, provested early in the morning of the twenty-se- vided he promises to enter into our livery. It venth. The marshal Villars was so confident is wonderful, that we will not take a footman that we designed to attack him, that he had without credentials from his last master; and drawn great part of the garrison of the place, in the greatest concern of life, we make no which is now invested, into the field; for which scruple of falling into a treaty with the most reason, it is presumed, it must submit within a notorious offender in this behaviour against small time, which the enemy cannot prevent, others. But this breach of commerce between but by coming out of their present camp, and the sexes proceeds from an unaccountable prehazarding a general engagement. These ad- valence of custom, by which a woman is to the vices add, that the garrison of Mons had march-last degree reproachable for being deceived, and ed out under the command of marshal d'Aco; a man suffers no loss of credit for being a dewhich, with the Bavarians, Walloons, and the troops of Cologn, have joined the grand army of the enemy.

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ceiver.

Since this tyrant humour has gained place, why are we represented in the writings of men in ill figures for artifice in our carriage, when we have to do with a professed impostor? When oaths, imprecations, vows, and adorations are made use of as words of course, what arts are not necessary to defend us from such as glory in the breach of them? As for my part, I am resolved to hear all, and believe none of them; and therefore solemnly declare no vow

BY MRS. JENNY DISTAFF, HALF-SISTER TO shall deceive me, but that of marriage: for I

MR. BICKERSTAFF.

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My brother has made an excursion into the country, and the work against Saturday lies upon me. I am very glad I have got pen and ink in my hand; for I have for some time longed for his absence, to give a right idea of things, which I thought he put in a very odd light, and some of them to the disadvantage of my own sex. It is much to be lamented, that it is necessary to make discourses, and publish treatises, to keep the horrid creatures, the men, within the rules of common decency.

am turned of twenty, and being of a small fortune, some wit, and (if I can believe my lovers and my glass) handsome, I have heard all that can be said towards my undoing; and shall therefore, for warning-sake, give an account of the offers that have been made me, my manner of rejecting them, and my assistances to keep my resolution.

In the sixteenth year of my life, I fell into the acquaintance of a lady extremely well known in this town for the quick advancement of her husband, and the honours and distinctions which her industry has procured him and all who belong to her. This excellent body sat next to me for some months at church, and I gladly embrace this opportunity to express took the liberty, which,' she said, 'her years myself with the resentment I ought, on people and the zeal she had for my welfare gave her who take liberties of speech before that sex, claim to, to assure me, that she observed some of whom the honoured names of Mother, parts of my behaviour which would lead me into Daughter, and Sister are a part: I had like to errors, and give encouragement to some to have named wife in the number; but the sense-entertain hopes I did not think of. What made less world are so mistaken in their sentiments of pleasure, that the most amiable term in human life is become the derision of fools and scorners. My brother and I have at least fifty times quarrelled upon this topic. I ever argue, that the frailties of women are to be imputed to the false ornaments which men of wit put upon our folly and coquetry. He lays all the vices of men upon women's secret approbation of libertine characters in them. I did not care to give up a point; but, now he is out of the way, I cannot but own I believe there is very much in what he asserted: but if you will believe your eyes, and own, that the wickedest and

you,' said she, 'look through your fan at that lord, when your eyes should have been turned upwards, or closed in attention upon better ob jects?' I blushed, and pretended fifty odd excuses;-but confounded myself the more. She wanted nothing but to see that confusion, and goes on; Nay, child, do not be troubled that I take notice of it; my value for you made me speak it; for though he is my kinsman, I have a nearer regard to virtue than any other consideration.' She had hardly done speaking, when this noble lord came up to us and led her to her coach.

My head ran all that day and night on the

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