UNTO THE RIGHT HONOURABLE THE LORDS OF COUNCIL AND SESSION, THE PETITION OF THE CLERKS AND APPRENTICES OF THE WRITERS TO THE SIGNET.
This and the succeeding article appeared in the Cornucopia Britannica, a periodical work, which commenced its ephemeral existence early in the year 1832, or end of the year 1831. The first Petition, from the reference to the tax on powder, is evidently of a much earlier date than the second.
That your petitioners, with much regret,
Take up your Lordships' time their ills to state;
But, conscious that your Lordships succour lend,
The sad to comfort, and the poor befriend,
We've dared, with boldness, to reveal our grief,
And from your Lordships' justice hope relief.
We've struggled long chill penury to hide,
But now necessity o'ercomes our pride ;
Though modesty concealed our pressing need,
Our hollow stomachs would cry out for bread;
And sure this humble prayer, more grateful far
Than empty sounds of hunger at your bar,
Without poetic ornament or fiction
We'll shortly state our case to your conviction.
Your Lordships know 'tis ours to copy pages,
For each of which poor threepence is our wages,—
And that in this unprofitable way
We're scarce employed a fourth part of the day,
Most of our masters thinking it quite fair
To keep three extra clerks—to live on air,
Though they themselves could finish every line,
They must have clerks-for what? To cut a shine.
Our other time like chairmen we must spend,
So many messages our masters send ;
In borrowing processes and craving debtors,
Taking down rolls and passing signet letters,
And trudging idly through the Outer House,
We spend our time, or rather time abuse.
How many a writer's clerk attends the Court
Without one cause his spirits to support!
Yet see with how much cheerfulness he walks,
And over knotty points majestic talks!
Now sudden starts, as if awake from slumber,
Runs to the Macer, and cries, "What's the number?”
Although with that he has no more to do
Then if he were a miner in Peru.
Full many a tedious year has passed away,
Since writers' clerks have got increase of pay,
And e'en this ill we might with patience bear,
Had not each necessary grown so dear.
A writer's clerk, full fifty years ago,
On thirty pounds a year would be a beau,
But now with that same sum we scarce can hide
Our naked skin, and meat and drink provide.
Tradesmen of all descriptions raise their wages,
Why, therefore, no increase for copying pages?
If we're employ'd to copy any paper,
For instance, to a hosier or a draper,
Our charge is truly not a farthing more
Than what it was some forty years before;
But if we need a hat, or coat, or stocking,-
With great submission, is it not provoking?
Our draper says he cannot sell it under
Five times the price it cost in seventeen hunder.
We groan beneath a sad, but just, taxation,
From which there's little hope of extrication.
We'll pay the taxes while we have a groat,
Whether your Lordships grant our prayers or not.
But one late tax afflicts us to the heart,
Because we cannot with a guinea part:
When powder'd, we were decent looking fellows,
But now resemble blacksmiths at their bellows :
We're pointed out, our very soul it racks,
As writers' clerks who can't afford the tax.
While other tradesmen join in combinations
To raise their wages, or desert their stations.*
* The preceding eight lines occur in a printed periodical," published by W. Smith, 3 Bristo Street, Edinburgh."
To aid our plea, truth, justice, sense refined,
Are in your Lordships' generous hearts combined.
In order all these hardships to prevent,
May't therefore please your Lordships to augment
The price of pages to a penny more
Than the low rate at which they were before;
And your petitioners shall pray sincere
That you may live and judge ten thousand year.
THE COMPLAINT, No. 2; OR, FURTHER REASONS WHY THE WAGES OF THE WRITERS' CLERKS AND APPRENTICES SHOULD BE ENCREASED.
From the Cornucopia Britannica,-21st January 1832.
With pleasure I perused your last edition,
Wherein I read the "Writers' Clerks Petition;"
And I am hopeful that their Lordships will
Decern simpliciter, and pass our bill.
But should they take our case to avizandum,
And, before decree, wish an audiendum,
We'll depute one more versant in the laws
To plead our noble, plead our glorious cause.
No more shall we submit to such vexation,
For, in our case, no tacit relocation
Binds us to do, de facto, what, 'tis plain,
No lawyer could, de jure, well maintain.
Things cannot long remain in statu quo,
We must have decree, and that in foro.
The following reasons seem to me, 'mong others,
On which with deference, my learned brothers
May rest their suit for further augmentation,
And bring about a glorious reformation :-
Full many a year is spent in abstract study,
To gain admittance to this learned body;
And, when admitted, view the pomp and show,
We must exhibit ex officio.
Tu de vud ans pour åpence is our quantum,
Pai vá a grDLE. IR KULer tantum.
The vores d53 ZE, IN a numerous flock,
La reva de rue if vid M-Culloch spoke,*
Ir sme pratt nuxers sport der eight or nine,
Dr. 4 ms. * edi inish every line.”
WA MEK V Du ani as our last resort,
We fy u en stops using law and Court!
Wenger preses, and with Edle care,
W+ 300 1990 & girirus * bill of fare.”
← Tor” me laws as he takes his stick,
Yuri's bama i nederace, but our system's tick.
* Emi mrziv, fel” yorth every one and all,
THECinext time we call.
The Hurs zv. and at the crafish line.
Know what is he decks to eat a shine,"
So things ran a t credit is no more—
Then we enlist, and leave our native shore.
The dei a wretched life we end,
And de unheeded in a foreign land.
This to avert, and save yourself from blame,
Then raise your wages, writers, oh! for shame!
Tis strange, surpassing strange, that we,
A learned body, full worse off should be
Than your domestics, who must all be paid,
Whether they clean your shoes, or dress your head.
Keep no more clerks than you can well employ,
Then cares will cease, and we shall life enjoy.
A better race ne'er graced Edina's plains,
Nor ever will, while time and tide remains,—
A vigorous offspring to the state we'll raise
To fight for Scotland.-die for Scotland's praise.
All future ages, then, shall bless the day
When writers' clerks received increase of pay.
No more I add, but am with great respect,
Your's, most obediently,-
It is one of Mr. M‘Culloch's principles of political economy, that the people
in England have out-grown labour.
YOUR YOUNG WRITER TO THE SIGNET; A SKETCH.
This article appeared in the Scots Magazine for May 1826, and was generally (and we understand correctly) ascribed to a barrister of great literary talent. It gave great offence, owing chiefly to the style, which is remarkably vituperative; there is, however, considerable truth in some portion of the remarks, although as a whole the sketch is exaggerated.
"He is a shark of the first magnitude."
This is the creature's general character; let us contemplate some individual traits of it. He is the eldest son of another Writer to the Signet, the younger son of a country laird, or perhaps the grown up brat of a rustic parson, whose quondam pupil and patron has enabled him to place his son in the chambers of a proud, overgrown agent, without payment of an apprentice fee. In his boyhood, the creature, in spite of the monstrous thickness of his skull, learned to decline penna, and to conjugate scribo; and penna and scribo, in their respective cases and tenses, comprised all that could be designated learning in the composition of the creature's mental constitution. With this stock of varied and profound erudition, the thing was sent to College, to learn two or three additional words of the Latin language, and, if possible, one or two of Greek. After spending two winter sessions at College, agreeably to the rules of that self-called enlightened corporation, to whose grasping privileges he aspires to be admitted, he finds, or at least it is taken for granted, that he has acquired, in addition to his former learning, a tolerably complete knowledge of the verb rapio, signifying to arrest and plunder, with all its derivatives and compounds it remains, however, a matter of doubt to himself, and to all others, whether he knows a single syllable, much less a word of Greek. A glimmering recollection flits across his brain, that the word ágyúgo, signifying money, once formed an item in his literary store. Thus, with a mind so amply
|