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ther it has not added another malady, instead of curing the first. You must consider, that those who tell you of your faults, if they do it from 10tives of kindness, and not of malice, exert their friendship in a painful office, which must have cost them as great an effort as it can be to you to acknowledge the service: and, if you refuse this encouragement, you cannot expect that any one, who is not absolutely obliged to it by duty, will a second time undertake such an ill-requited trouble, What a loss would this be to yourself! How difficult would be our progress to that degree of perfec. tion, which is necessary to our happiness, were it not for the assistance we receive from each other. This certainly is one of the means of grace held out io us by our merciful Judge; and, if we reject it, we are answerable for all the miscarriages we may fall into for want of it.
I know not whether that strange-caprice, that inequality of taste and behaviour, so commonly attribated to our sex, may be properly called a fault of temper; as it seems not to be connected with, or arising from our animal frame; but to be rather the fruit of our own self-indulgence, degenerating by degrees into such a wantonness of will as knows not how to please itself. When, instead of regulating our actions by reason and principle, we suffer ourselves to be guided by every slight and momentary imputse of inclination, we shall, doubtless, appear so variable and inconstant, that nobody can guess, by our behaviour to-day, what may be expected from us to-morrow; nor can we our. selves tell whether what we delighted in, a week ago, will now afford us the least degree of pleasure. It is vain for others to attempt to please us;
we cannot please ourselves, through all we could wish for, waits our choice: and thus does a capricious woman become “ sick of herself, through very " selfishness :" And, when this is the case, it is easy to judge how sick others must be of her, and how contemptible and disgusting she must appear. This wrctclied state is the usual consequence of
power and flattery. May my dear child never meet with the temptation of that excessive and ill-judged indulgence from a husband, which she has happily escaped from her parents, and which seldom fails to reduce women to the miserable condition of a humoured child, always uahappy from having no. body's will to study but its owy! The insolence of such demands for yourself, and such disregard to the choice and inclinations of others, can seldomi fail to make you as many enemies as there are persons obliged to bear with your humours: whilst a compliant, reasonable, and contented disposition, would render you happy in yourself, and beloyed by all your companions, particularly by those who live constantly with you; and, of what consequence this is to your happiness, a inoment's reflection will convince you. Family friendships,
- by God himself. With the kindest intentions, he has knit the bands of family love, by indispensable duties: and wretched are they who have burst them asunder by violence and ill-will, or woru them out by constant little disobligations, and by the want of that attention to please, which the presence of a stranger always inspires, but which is so often shamelylly neglected towards those, whom it is Most our duty and interest to please.—May you, my dear, be wise enough to see that every faculty of entertainment, every engaging qualification, which you possess, is exerted to the best advantage for those, whose love is of most importance to you;
for those who live under the same roof, and with wbom you are covnected for life, either by the ties of blood, or by the still more sacred obligations of a voluntary engagement.
To make you the delight and darling of your family, something more is required than barely to be exempt from ill-teinper and troublesome huu. mours: the siacere and genuine siniles of complacency and love must adorn your countenance: that ready compliance, that alertness to assisi and oblige, which demonstrates true affection, musi animale
your behaviour, and endear your most common ac. tion: politeness must accompany your greatest. familiarities, and restrain you from everything that is really offensive, or which can give a moment's unnecessary pain: conversation, which is 20 apt to grow dull and insipid in families, nay, in some to be almost wholly laid aside, must be culti. vated with the frankness and openness of friend. ship, and by the mutual communication of what. ever may conduce to the improvement or innocent entertainment of each other.
Reading, whether apart or in common, will fur. vish useful and pleasing subjects; and the sprightliness of youth will naturally inspire harmless mirth and native humour, if encouraged by a mutual de. sire of diverting each other, and making the hours pass agreeably in your own house: every amuse. ment that offers, will be heightened by the participation of these dear companions, and by talking over every incident together, and every object of pleasure. If you have auy acquired talent of entertaininent, such as music, painting, or the like, your own family are those before whom you should most wish to excel, and for whom you should always be ready to exert yourself; not suffering the accomplishments which you have gained, perhaps by their means, and at their expence, to lie dormant, till the arrival of a stranger gives you spirit in the performance. Where this last is the case, you may be sure vanity is the only motive of the exertion ;A stranger will praise you more. But how little sensibility has that heart wbich is not more gratified, by the silent pleasure painted on the countenance of a partial parent, or of an affectionate brother, than by the empty compliment of a visitor, who is perhaps inwardly more disposed to criticise and ridicule than to admire you!
I have been longer in this letter than I intended; yet it is with difficulty I can quit the subject, because 1. think it is seldom sufficiently insisted on, either in books or in sermons; and because there are many persons weak enough to believe themselves in a safe
and innocent course of life, whilst they are daily harassing every body about them by their vexatious humours. But you will, I hope, constantly bear in mind, that you can never treat a fellow-creature un. kindly, without offending the kind Creator and Fa. ther of all;--and that you can no way render your. self so acceptable to Him, as by studying to pro. mote the happiness of others, in every instance, small as well as great. The favour of God, and the love of your companions, will surely be deemed rewards sufficient to animate your inost fervent endeavours: yet this is not all: the disposition of mind, which I would recommend, is its own re. ward, and is in itself essential to happiness. Cul. tivate it, therefore, my dear child, with your utmost diligence; and watch the symptoms of ill-temper as they rise, with a firm resolution to conquer them, before they are even perceived by any other person. In every such inward conflict, call upon your Maker, to assist the feeble nature he hath given you; and sacrifice to Him every feeling that would tempt you to disobedience: so will you at length attain the true Christian meekuess, which is blessed in the sight of God and man; “ which lias the promise of " this life, as well as of that which is to come." Then will you pity, in others, those infirmities which you lave conquered in yourself; and will think yourself as much bound to assist, by your patience and gentleness, those who are so unhappy as to be under the dominion of evil passions, as you are to impart a share of your riches to the poor and miserable.
My dearest Niece ; TCONOMY is so important a part of a woman's
W character, so necessary to her own happiness, and so essential to her performing properly the du.. ties of a wife and of a mother, that it ought to have the precedence of all other accomplishinents, and take its rank next to the first duties of life. It is, moreover, an art as well as a virtue and, many well-meaning persons, from ignorance, or from inconsideration, are strangely deficient in it. Indeed it is too often wholly neglected in a young woman's education ;-and, she is sent from her father's house to govern a family, without the least degree of that knowledge, which should qualify her for it: this is the source of much inconvenience: for, though ex. perience and attention may supply, by degrees, the want of instruction, yet this requires tine: the family, in the mean time, may get into habits which are very difficult to alter; and, what is worse, the husband's opinion of his wife's incapacity may be fixed too strongly to suffer him ever, to think justly of her gradual improvements. I would, therefore, earnestly advise you to make use of every opportu. nity you can find, for laying-in some store of knowledge on this subject, before you are called upon to the practice; by observing what passes before you, -by consulting prudent and experienced mistresses of families,-and' by entering in a book a memo. randum of every new piece of intelligence you acquire: you may afterwards compare these with more mature observations, and you can make ad. ditions and corrections, as you see occasion. I hope it will not be long before your mother entrusts you