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In Troy, there lies the scene. From isles
SCENE, TROY, and the Grecian Camp before it.
The princes orgulous, their high blood chaf'd,
THERSITES, a deformed and scurrilous Grecian.
And the deep-drawing barks do there disgorge
Servant to Troilus.
Servant to Paris.
Servant to Diomedes.
SCENE I. Troy. Before Priam's Palace. Enter TROILUS armed, and PANDARUS. Tre. Call here my varlet, I'll unarm again : Why should I war without the walls of Troy, That find such cruel battle here within ?
HELEN, wife to Menelaus.
ANDROMACHE, wife to Hector.
CASSANDRA, daughter to Priam, a prophetess.
Trojan and Greek Soldiers, and Attendants.
of | Dardan, and Tymbria, Ilias, Chetas, Trojan,
And corresponsive and fulfilling bolts,
Now expectation, tickling skittish spirits,
Like, or find fault; do as your pleasures are ;
Each Trojan, that is master of his heart,
Tro. The Greeks are strong, and skilful to their
But I am weaker than a woman's tear,
Pan. Well, I have told you enough of this: for my part, I'll not meddle nor make no further. He, that will have a cake out of the wheat, must tarry the grinding.
Tro. Have I not tarried?
Pan. Ay, the grinding; but you must tarry the bolting.
Tro. Have I not tarried?
Pan. Ay, the bolting: but you must tarry the leavening.
Tro. Still have I tarried.
Pan. Ay, to the leavening: but here's yet in the word hereafter, the kneading, the making of the cake, the heating of the oven, and the baking; nay, you must stay the cooling too, or you may chance to burn your lips.
Tro. Patience herself, what goddess e'er she be, Doth lesser blench at sufferance than I do. At Priam's royal table do I sit; And when fair Cressid comes into my thoughts, So, traitor! when she comes! When is she
Pan. Well, she looked yesternight fairer than ever I saw her look, or any woman else. Tro. I was about to tell thee, . When my heart, As wedged with a sigh, would rive in twain; Lest Hector or my father should perceive me, I have (as when the sun doth light a storm,) Bury'd this sigh in wrinkle of a smile: But sorrow, that is couch'd in seeming gladness, Is like that mirth fate turns to sudden sadness.
Tro. O, Pandarus! I tell thee, Pandarus, When I do tell thee, There my hopes lie drown'd, Reply not in how many fathoms deep
They lie indrench'd. I tell thee, I am mad
In Cressid's love: Thou answer'st, She is fair;
As true thou tell'st me, when I say - I love her;
Tro. What, art thou angry, Pandarus? what, with me?
Pan. Because she is kin to me, therefore she's not so fair as Helen: an she were not kin to me, she would be as fair on Friday, as Helen is on Sunday. But, what care I? I care not, an she were a black-a-moor; 'tis all one to me.
Pan. I speak no more than truth.
Tro. Thou dost not speak so much.
Pan. 'Faith, I'll not meddle in't. Let her be as she is if she be fair, 'tis the better for her; an she be not, she has the mends in her own hands.
Tro. Good Pandarus! How now, Pandarus? Pan. I have had my labour for my travel; illthought on of her, and ill-thought on of you: gone between and between, but small thanks for my labour
Tro. Say I, she is not fair?
Pan. I do not care whether you do or no. She's a fool to stay behind her father; let her to the Greeks; and so I'll tell her the next time I see her: for my part, I'll meddle nor make no more in the
Tro. Pandarus, — Pan. Not I.
Tro. Sweet Pandarus,
Pan. Pray you, speak no more to me; I will leave all as I found it, and there an end. [Exit PANDARUS. An alarum. Tro. Peace, you ungracious clamours! peace, rude sounds!
Fools on both sides! Helen must needs be fair,
It is too starv'd a subject for my sword.
Alarum. Enter ENEAS.
Ene. How now, prince Troilus? wherefore not afield?
Tro. Because not there; This woman's answer
For womanish it is to be from thence.
Troilus, by Menelaus. Tro. Let Paris bleed: 'tis but a scar to scorn; Paris is gor'd with Menelaus' horn. [Alarum. Ene. Hark! what good sport is out of town today!
Tro. Better at home, if would I might, were may. But, to the sport abroad; Ene. In all swift haste. Tro.
Are you bound thither?
Come, go we then together. [Exeunt.
SCENE II. The same. A Street.
Queen Hecuba, and Helen.
Cres. So do all men ; unless they are drunk, sick, or have no legs.
Alex. This man, lady, hath robbed many beasts of their particular additions; he is as valiant as the lion, churlish as the bear, slow as the elephant: a man into whom nature hath so crouded humos, that his valour is crushed into folly, his foily sauced with discretion: there is no man hath a virtue that he hath not a glimpse of; nor any man an attaint, but he carries some stain of it: he is melancholy without cause, and merry against the hair : He hath the joints of every thing; but every thing so out of joint, that he is a gouty Briareus, many hands and no use; or purblind Argus, all eyes and no sight.
Cres. But how should this man, that makes me smile, make Hector angry?
Alex. They say, he yesterday coped Hector in the battle, and struck him down; the disdain and shame whereof hath ever since kept Hector fasting and waking.
Cres. Who comes here?
Alex. Madam, your uncle Pandarus.
Alex. As may be in the world, lady.
Pan. Good morrow, cousin Cressid: What do you talk of?-Good morrow, Alexander.-How do you, cousin? When were you at Ilium?
Cres. This morning, uncle.
Pan. What were you talking of, when I came ? Was Hector armed, and gone, ere ye came to Ilium? Helen was not up, vas she?
Cres. Hector was gone; but Helen was not
Cres. So he says here.
Pan. True, he was so; I know the cause too; he'll lay about him to-day, I can tell them that: and there is Troilus will not come far behind him; | let them take heed of Troilus; I can tell them that too.
Cres. What, is he angry too?
Pan. Who, Troilus? Troilus is the better man of the two.
Cres. O, Jupiter! there's no comparison.
Pan. What, not between Troilus and Hector?
Pan. No, nor Hector is not Troilus, in some degrees.
Cres. 'Tis just to each of them; he is himself. Pan. Himself? Alas, poor Troilus! I would, he were,
Pan. Well, I say, Troilus is Troilus.
Cres. Then you say as I say; for, I am sure, he is not Hector.
Cres. He is not Hector.
Pan. Himself? no, he's not himself.-'Would 'a were himself! Well, the gods are above; Time must friend, or end: Well, Troilus, well, I would, my heart were in her body! No, Hector is not a better man than Troilus. Cres. Excuse me.
Pan. He is elder.
Cres. Pardon me, pardon me.
Pan. The other's not come to't; you shall tell me another tale, when the other's come to't. Hector shall not have his wit this year.
Cres. He shall not need it, if he have his own.
Cres. "Twould not become him, his own's better.' Pan. You have no judgment, niece: Helen herself swore the other day, that Troilus, for a brown favour, (for so 'tis, I must confess,) — Not brown neither.
Do you know a man, if you see him?
Cres. Ay; if I ever saw him before, and knew that Helen loves Troilus,
Cres. Juno have mercy! How came it cloven? Pan. Why, you know, 'tis dimpled: I think, his smiling becomes him better than any man in all Phrygia.
Cres. O, he smiles valiantly.
Pan. Does he not?
Cres. O yes, an 'twere a cloud in autumn.
Pan. Why, go to then; But to prove to you
Cres. Troilus will stand to the proof, if you'll prove it so.
Pan. Troilus? why, he esteems her no more than I esteem an addle egg.
Cres. What was his answer?
Pan. Quoth she, Here's but one and fifty hairs on your chin, and one of them is white.
Cres. This is her question.
Pan. That's true; make no question of that. One and fifty hairs, quoth he, and one white: That white hair is my father, and all the rest are his sons. Jupiter! quoth she, which of these hairs is Paris my husband? The forked one, quoth he, pluck it out, and give it him. But, there was such laughing! and Helen so blushed, and Paris so chafed, and all the rest so laughed, that it passed.
Cres. So let it now; for it has been a great while going by.
Pan. Well, cousin, I told you a thing yesterday; think on't.
Cres. So I do.
Pan. I'll be sworn, 'tis true; he will weep you, an 'twere a man born in April.
Cres. And I'll spring up in his tears, an 'twere a nettle against May. [A retreat sounded. Pan. Hark, they are coming from the field: Shall we stand up here, and see them, as they pass toward Ilium? good niece, do; sweet niece Cressida.
Cres. At your pleasure.
Pan. Here, here, here's an excellent place; here we may see most bravely: I'll tell you them all by their names, as they pass by; but mark Troilus
above the rest.
HELENUS passes over.
Pan. That's Helenus, I marvel, where Troilus :- - That's Helenus; I think he went not forth to-day: :- That's Helenus.
Cres. Can Helenus fight, uncle?
Pan. Helenus? no;-yes, he'll fight indifferent well I marvel, where Troilus is! - Hark; de you not hear the people cry, Troilus? Helenus is a priest.
Cres. What sneaking fellow comes yonder?
TROILUS passes over.
Pan. Where? yonder? that's Deiphobus: 'Tis Troilus! there's a man, niece! Hem! - Brave Troilus! the prince of chivalry.
Cres. Peace, for shame, peace!
Pan. Mark him; note him; - O brave Troilus. look well upon him, niece; look you, how his sword is bloodied, and his helm more hack'd than Hector's; And how he looks, and how he goes! O admirable youth! he ne'er saw three and twenty. Go thy way, Troilus, go thy way; had I a sister were a grace, or a daughter a goddess, he should take his choice. O admirable man! Paris? - Paris is dirt to him; and, I warrant, Helen, to change, would give an eye to boot.
Forces pass over the Stage. Cres. Here come more.
Pan. Asses, fools, dolts! chaff and bran, chaff and bran! porridge after meat! I could live and die i'the eyes of Troilus. Ne'er look, ne'er look; the eagles are gone; crows and daws, crows and daws! I had rather be such a man as Troilus, than Agamemnon and all Greece.
Cres. There is among the Greeks, Achilles; a better man than Troilus.
Pan. Achilles? a drayman, a porter, a very camel. Cres. Well, well.
Pan. Well, well? Why, have you any discretion? have you any eyes? Do you know what a man is? Is not birth, beauty, good shape, discourse, manhood, learning, gentleness, virtue, youth, libe