pretended to have given for news, as I did last Saturday, a diary of the siege of Troy. But man is a creature very inconsistent with himself: the greatest heroes are sometimes fearful the sprightliest wits at some hours dull; and the greatest politicians, on some occasions, whimsical. But I shall not pretend to palliate or excuse the matter; for I find, by a calculation of my own nativity; that I cannot hold out with any tolerable wit longer than two minutes after twelve of the clock at night, between the eighteenth and nineteenth of the next month for which space of time you may still expect to hear from me, but no longer; except you will transmit to me the occurences you meet with relating to your amours, or any other subject within the rules by which I have proposed to walk. If any gentleman or lady sends to Isaac Bickerstaff, esq. at Mr. Morphew's, near Stationer's-hall, by the penny-post, the grief or joy of their soul, what they think fit of the matter shall be related in colours as much to their advantage, as those in which Gervas* has drawn the agreeable Chloe. But since, without such assistance, I frankly confess, and am sensible, that I have not a month's wit more, I think I ought, while I am in my sound health and senses, to make my will and testament; which I do in manner and form following : * Imprimis, I give to the stock-jobbers about the Exchange of London, as a security for the trusts daily reposed in them, all my real estate; which I do hereby vest in the said body of worthy citizens for ever. Item, Forasmuch as it is very hard to keep land in repair without ready cash, I do, out of my personal estate, bestow the bear-skin,† which I have frequently lent to several societies about this town, to supply their necessities; I say, I give also the said bear-skin, as an immediate fund to the said citizens for ever. Item, I do hereby appoint a certain number of the said citizens to take all the custom-house or customary oaths concerning all goods imported by the whole city; strictly directing, that some select members, and not the whole number of a body corporate, should be perjured. Item, I forbid all n- -s and persons of -ty to watch bargains near and about the Exchange, to the diminution and wrong of the said stock-jobbers. 'Thus far, in as brief and intelligible a manner as any will can appear, until it is explained by the learned, I have disposed of my real and personal estate; but, as I am an adept, I have by birth an equal right to give also an indefeasible title to my endowments and qualifications, which I do in the following manner. Item, I give my chastity to all virgins who have withstood their market. * Jervas. † Stock-jobbers, who contract for a future transfer of stock which they do not possess, are called sellers of bearskins; and universally, whoever sells what he does not possess, is said, proverbially, to sell the bear's skin, while the bear runs in the woods. In the language of Exchange-alley, bears signify those who buy stock which they cannot receive, or who sell stock which they have not. Those who pay money for what they purchase, or who sell stock which they have, are called bulls. Item, I give my courage among all who are ashamed of their distressed friends, all sneakers in assemblies, and men who show valour in common conversation. Item, I give my wit (as rich men give to the rich) among such as think they have enough already. And in case they shall not accept of the legacy, I give it to Bentivolio* to defend his works, from time to time, as he shall think fit to publish them. 'Item, I bestow my learning upon the honorary members of the Royal Society. Now for the disposal of this body. 'As these eyes must one day cease to gaze on Teraminta, and this heart shall one day pant no more for her indignation: that is to say, since this body must be earth; I shall commit it to the dust in a manner suitable to my character. Therefore, as there are those who dispute, whether there is any such real person as Isaac Bickerstaff or not; I shall excuse all persons who appear what they really are, from coming to my funeral. But all those who are, in their way of life, persone, as the Latins have it, persons assumed, and who appear what they really are not, are hereby invited to that solemnity. The body shall be carried by six watchmen, who are never seen in the day. 'Item, The pall shall be held up by the six most known pretenders to honesty, wealth, and power, who are not possessed of any of them. The two first a half-lawyer and a complete justice. The two next, a chemist and a projector. The third couple, a treasury-solicitor and a small courtier. To make my funeral (what that solemnity, when done to common men, really is in itself) a very farce; and since all mourners are mere actors on these occasions, I shall desire those who are professedly such to attend mine. I humbly, therefore, beseech Mrs. Barry to act once more, and be my widow. When she swoons away at the church-porch, I appoint the merry sir John Falstaff, and the gay sir Harry Wildair, to support her. I desire Mr. Pinkethman to follow in the habit of a cardinal, and Mr. Bullock in that of a privy-counsellor. To make up the rest of the appearance, I desire all the ladies from the balconies to weep with Mrs. Barry, as they hope to be wives and widows themselves. I invite all, who have nothing else to do, to accept of gloves and scarfs. 'Thus, with the great Charles V. of Spain, I resign the glories of this transitory world: yet, at the same time, to show you my indif ference, and that my desires are not too much fixed upon any thing, I own to you, I am as willing to stay as to go: therefore leave it in the choice of my gentle readers, whether I shall hear from them, or they hear no more from me." her he is a fine gentleman, and a man of consequence; and she in appearing to him an accomplished lady and a wit, without further design. Thus he tells her of his manner of posting his men at such a pass, with the numbers he commanded on that detachment: she tells him, how she was dressed on such a day at court, and what offers were made her the week following. She seems to hear the repetition of his men's names with admiration, and waits only to answer him with as false a muster of lovers. They talk to each other not to be informed, but approved. Thus they are so like, that they are to be ever distant, and the parallel lines may run together for ever, but never meet. Will's Coffee-house, April 25. This evening the comedy, called 'Epsom Wells,'* was acted for the benefit of Mr. Bullock, who, though he is a person of much wit and ingenuity, has a peculiar talent for looking like a fool, and therefore excellently well qualified for the part of Bisket in this play. I cannot indeed sufficiently admire his way of bearing a beating, as he does in this drama, and that with such a natural air and propriety of folly, that one cannot help wishing the whip in one's own hand; so richly does he seem to deserve his chastisement. Skilful actors think it a very peculiar happiness to play in a scene with such as top their parts. Therefore I cannot but say, when the judgment of any good author directs him to write a beating for Mr. Bullock from Mr. William Pinkethman, or for Mr. William Pinkethman from Mr. Bullock, those excellent players seem to be in their most shining circumstances, and please me more, but with a different sort of delight, than that which I receive from those grave scenes of Brutus and Cassius, or Antony and Ventidius. The whole comedy is very just, and the low part of human life represented with much hu and there being such a thing as low gallantry, Probably colonel Brett, who is said to have been one of the chief companions of Addison and Steele. Alluding to the similarity of sound between the word unmarred and unmarried. D St. James's Coffee-house, April 25. We are advised from Vienna, by letters of the twentieth instant, that the emperor hath lately added twenty new members to his council of state; but they have not yet taken their places at the board. General Thaun is returned from Baden, his health being so well re-established by the baths of that place, that he designs to set out next week for Turin, to his command of the imperial troops in the service of the duke of Savoy. His imperial majesty has advanced his brother, count Henry Thaun, to be a brigadier, and a counsellor of the Aulic council of war. These letters import, that king Stanislaus and the Swedish general Crassau, are directing their march to the Nieper to join the king of Sweden's army in Ukrania; that By Thomas Shadwell, afterwards poet-laureat to king William III. It was first printed in quarto, 1676, but it was acted, it should seem, from 1673. He stripped the laurel from the brows of Dryden, who thereupon wrote the bitterest satire that ever was penned, entitled M'Flecknoe.' He died suddenly in 1692, aged 52; and his friend Dr. N. Brady, preached his funeral sermon. the states of Austria have furnished marshal Hiester with a considerable sum of money to enable him to push on the war vigorously in Hungary, where all things as yet are in perfect tranquillity; and that general Thungen has been very importunate for a speedy reinforcement of the forces on the Upper Rhine, representing, at the same time, what miseries the inhabitants must necessarily undergo, if the designs of France on those parts be not speedily and effectually prevented. Letters from Rome, dated the thirteenth instant, say, that on the preceding Sunday, his holiness was carried in an open chair from St. Peter's to St. Mary's, attended by the sacred college, in cavalcade; and, after mass, distributed several dowries for the marriage of poor and distressed virgins. The proceedings of that court are very dilatory concerning the recognition of king Charles, notwithstanding the pressing instances of the marquis de Prie, who has declared, that if this affair be not wholly concluded by the fifteenth instant, he will retire from that court, and order the imperial troops to return into the ecclesiastical state. On the other hand, the duke of Anjou's minister has, in the name of his master, demanded of his holiness to explain himself on that affair; which, it is said, will be finally determined in a consistory to be held on Monday next; the duke d'Uzeda designing to delay his departure until he sees the issue. These letters also say, that the court was mightily alarmed at the news which they received by an express from Ferrara, that general Boneval, who commands in Comachio, had sent circular letters to the inhabitants of St. Alberto, Longastrino, Fillo, and other adjacent parts, enjoining them to come and swear fealty to the emperor, and receive new investitures of their fiefs from his hands. Letters from other parts of Italy say, that the king of Denmark continues at Lucca; that four English and Dutch men-of-war were seen off Onglia, bound for Final, in order to transport the troops designed for Barcelona; and that her majesty's ship the Colchester arrived at Leghorn the fourth instant from PortMahon, with advice that major-general Stanhope designed to depart from thence the first instant with six or seven thousand men, to attempt the relief of the castle of Alicant. We hear from Copenhagen, that the ice being broke, the Sound is again open for the ships; and that they hoped his majesty would return sooner than they at first expected. Letters from the Hague, dated May the fourth, N. S. say, that an express arrived there on the first, from prince Eugene to his grace the duke of Marlborough. The States are advised that the auxiliaries of Saxony were arrived on the frontiers of the United Provinces ; as also, that the two regiments of Wolfenbuttel, and four thousand troops from Wirtemberg, who are to serve in Flanders, are in full march thither. Letters from Flanders say, that the great convoy of ammunition and provisions, which set out from Ghent for Lisle, was safely arrived at Courtray. We hear from Paris that the king has ordered the militia on the coast of Normandy and Bretagne to be in readiness to march; and that the court was in apprehension of a descent to animate the people to rise in the midst of their present hardships. They write from Spain, that the pope's nuncio left Madrid the tenth of April, in order to go to Bayonne; that the marquis de Bay was at Badajos, to observe the motions of the Portuguese; and that the count d'Estain, with a body of five thousand men, was on his march to attack Gironne. The duke of Anjou has deposed the bishop of Lerida, as being a favourer of the interest of king Charles, and has summoned a convocation at Madrid, composed of the archbishops, bishops, and states of that kingdom, wherein he hopes they will come to a resolution to send for no more bulls to Rome. The play of the London Cuckolds* was acted this evening before a suitable audience, who were extremely well diverted with that heap of vice and absurdity. The indignation which Eugenio, who is a gentleman of a just taste, has upon occasion of seeing human nature fall so low in its delights, made him, I thought, expatiate upon the mention of this play very agreeably. Of all men living, said he, I pity players (who must be men of good understanding, to be capable of being such,) that they are obliged to repeat and assume proper gestures for representing things of which their reason must be ashamed, and which they must disdain their audience for approving. The amendment of these low gratifications is only to be made by people of condition, by encouraging the repre sentation of the noble characters drawn by Shakspeare and others, from whence it is im Our last advices from Berlin, bearing date the twenty-seventh instant, import that the king was gone to Linum, and the queen to Mecklenburg; but that their majesties designed to return the next week to Oranienburg, where a great chase of wild beasts was prepared for their diversion, and from thence they intend to proceed together to Potsdam; that the prince royal was set out for Brabant, but intended to make some short stay at Hanover. These letters also inform us, that they are advised from Obory, that the king of Sweden, being on his march towards Holki, met general Renne with a detachment of Muscovites, who, placing some regiments in ambuscade, attacked the Swedes in their rear, and putting them to flight, killed two thousand men, the king himself having his by Edward Ravenscroft. It used to be acted frequently, horse shot under him. * A very immoral, as well as a very ill-written comedy, especially upon Lord Mayor's days, in contempt, and to the disgrace of the city. were felt at Geneva; the magistrates of which city had appointed deputies to treat with the cantons of Bern and Zurich, for leave to buy up such quantities of grain, within their territories, as should be thought necessary. The protestants of Tockenburg are still in arms about the convent of St. John, and have declared, that they will not lay them down, until they shall have sufficient security from the Roman Catholics, of living unmolested in the exercise of their religion. In the mean time, the deputies of Bern and Tockenburg have frequent conferences at Zurich with the regency of that canton, to find out methods for quieting these disorders. Letters from the Hague, of the third of May, advise, that the president Rouille, after his last conference with the deputies of the States, had retired to Bodegrave, five miles distant from Worden, and expected the return of a courier from France on the fourth, with new instructions. It is said, if his answer from the French court shall not prove satisfactory, he will be desired to withdraw out of these parts. In the mean time it is also reported, that his equipage, as an ambassador on this great occasion, is actually on the march towards him. They write from Flanders, that the great convoy of provisions, which set out from Ghent, is safely arrived at Lisle. Those advices add, that the enemy had assembled near Tournay a consid possible to return without strong impressions of honour and humanity. On these occasions, distress is laid before us with all its causes and consequences, and our resentment placed according to the merit of the persons afflicted. Were dramas of this nature more acceptable to the taste of the town, men who have genius would bend their studies to excel in them. How forcible an effect this would have on our minds, one needs no more than to observe how strongly we are touched by mere pictures. Who can see Le Brun's picture of the battle of Porus, without entering into the character of that fierce gallant man, and being accordingly spurred to an emulation of his constancy and courage? When he is falling with his wound, the features are at the same time very terrible and languishing; and there is such a stern faintness diffused through all his look, as is apt to move a kind of horror, as well as pity, in the beholder. This, I say, is an effect wrought by mere lights and shades; consider also a representation made by words only, as in an account given by a good writer: Catiline, in Sallust, makes just such a figure as Porus by Le Brun. It is said of him, Catilina vero longe a suis inter hostium cadavera repertus est; paululum etiam spirans, ferocitatemque animi, quam vivus habuerat, in vultu retinens. Catiline was found killed far from his own men, among the dead bodies of the enemy: he seemed still to breathe, and still re-erable body of troops, drawn out of the neightained in his face the same fierceness he had when he was living.' You have in that one sentence a lively impression of his whole life and actions. What I would insinuate from all this is, that if the painter and the historian can do thus much in colours and language, what may not be performed by an excellent poet, when the character he draws is presented by the person, the manner, the look, and the motion, of an accomplished player? If a thing painted or related can irresistibly enter our hearts, what may not be brought to pass by seeing generous things performed before our eyes? Eugenio ended his discourse, by recommending the apt use o. a theatre, as the most agreeable and easy method of making a polite and moral gentry; which would end in rendering the rest of the people regular in their behaviour, and ambitious of laudable undertakings. 6 St. James's Coffee-house, April 27. Letters from Naples of the ninth instant, N. S. advise, that cardinal Grimani had ordered the regiment commanded by general Pate to march towards Final, in order to embark for Catalonia; whither also a thousand horse are to be transported from Sardinia, besides the troops which come from the Milanese. An English man-ofwar has taken two prizes, one a vessel of Malta, the other of Genoa, both laden with goods of the enemy. They write from Florence of the thirteenth, that his majesty of Denmark had received a courier from the Hague, with an account of some matters relating to the treaty of a peace, upon which he declared, that he thought it necessary to hasten to his own dominions. Letters from Switzerland inform us, that the effects of the great scarcity of corn in France bouring garrisons. Their high mightinesses having sent orders to their ministers at Hamburgh and Dantzic, to engage the magistrates of those cities to forbid the sale of corn to the French, and to signify to them, that the Dutch merchants will buy up as much of that commodity as they can spare; the Hamburghers have accordingly contracted with the Dutch, and refused any commerce with the French on that occasion. From my own Apartment. After the lassitude of a day, spent in the strolling manner which is usual with men of pleasure in this town, and with a head full of a million of impertinences, which had danced round it for ten hours together, I came to my lodging, and hastened to bed. My valet de chambre knows my university-trick of reading there; and he, being a good scholar for a gentleman, ran over the names of Horace, Tibullus, Ovid, and others, to know which I would have. 'Bring Virgil,' said I; and if I fall asleep, take care of the candle.' I read the sixth book over with the most exquisite delight, and had gone half through it a second time, when the pleasing ideas of Elysian fields, deceased worthies walking in them, true lovers enjoying their languishment without pain, compassion for the unhappy spirits who had misspent their short day-light, and were exiled from the seats of bliss for ever; say, I was deep again in my reading, when this mixture of images had taken place of all others in my imagination before, and lulled me into a dream, from which I am just awake, to my great disadvantage. The happy mansions of Elysium, by degrees, seemed to be wafted from me, and the very traces of my late waking thoughts be- bearing on his left arm a shield, on which was gan to fade away, when I was cast by a sudden engraven the image of victory, and in his right whirlwind upon an island, encompassed with a hand a branch of olive. His visage was at once roaring and troubled sea, which shaked its very so winning and so awful, that the shield and the centre, and rocked its inhabitants as in a cradle. olive seemed equally suitable to his genius. The islanders lay on their faces, without offer- When this illustrious person* touched on the ing to look up or hope for preservation; all her shore, he was received by the acclamations of harbours were crowded with mariners, and tall the people, and followed to the palace of the vessels of war lay in danger of being driven to heroine. No pleasure in the glory of her arms, pieces on her shores. Bless me!' said I, 'why or the acclamations of her applauding subjects, have I lived in such a manner, that the convul- were ever capable to suspend her sorrow for one sion of nature should be so terrible to me, when moment, till she saw the olive-branch in the I feel in myself that the better part of me is to hand of that auspicious messenger. At that sight, survive it? Oh! may that be in happiness!' as heaven bestows its blessings on the wants and A sudden shriek, in which the whole people on importunities of mortals, out of its native bounty, their faces joined, interrupted my soliloquy, and and not to increase its own power or honour, in turned my eyes and attention to the object that compassion to the world, the celestial mourner had given us that sudden start, in the midst of was then first seen to turn her regard to things an inconsolable and speechless affliction. Im- below; and, taking the branch out of the warmediately the winds grew calm, the waves sub-rior's hand, looked at it with much satisfaction, sided, and the people stood up, turning their faces upon a magnificent pile in the midst of the island. There we beheld a hero of a comely and erect aspect, but pale and languid, sitting under a canopy of state. By the faces and dumb sorrow of those who attended, we thought him in the article of death. At a distance sat a lady whose life seemed to hang upon the same thread with his; she kept her eyes fixed upon him, and seemed to smother ten thousand thousand name-resolution without rage, returned him the olive, less things, which urged her tenderness to clasp him in her arms; but her greatness of spirit overcame those sentiments, and gave her power to forbear disturbing his last moment; which immediately approached. The hero looked up with an air of negligence, and satiety of being, rather than of pain to leave it; and, leaning back his head, expired. and spoke of the blessings of peace, with a voice and accent, such as that in which guardian spirits whisper to dying penitents assurances of happiness. The air was hushed, the multitude attentive, and all nature in a pause while she was speaking. But as soon as the messenger of peace had made some low reply, in which, methought, I heard the word Iberia, the heroine, assuming a more severe air, but such as spoke and again veiled her face. Loud cries and clashing of arms immediately followed, which forced me from my charming vision, and drove me back to these mansions of care and sorrow. **Mr. Bickerstaff thanks Mr. Quarterstaff for his kind and instructive letter dated the twenty-sixth instant. No. 9.] Saturday, April 30, 1709. Quicquid agunt homines -nostri est farrago libelli. Juv. Sat. i. 85, 86. Will's Coffee-house, April 28. P. THIS evening we were entertained with The tion. In the character which gives name to Old Bachelor,† a comedy of deserved reputathe play, there is excellently represented the reluctance of a battered debauchee to come into When the heroine, who sat at a distance, saw his last instant come, she threw herself at his feet, and, kneeling, pressed his hand to her lips, in which posture she continued, under the agony of an unutterable sorrow, until conducted from our sight by her attendants. That commanding awe, which accompanies the grief of great minds, restrained the multitude while in her presence; but as soon as she retired, they gave way to their distraction, and all the islanders called upon their deceased hero. To him, methought, they cried out, as to a guardian being; and I gathered from their broken accents, that it was he who had the empire over the ocean and its powers, by which he had long protected the trammels of order and decency; he neither the island from shipwreck and invasion. They now give a loose to their moan, and think them. languishes nor burns, but frets for love. The selves exposed without hopes of human or divine gentlemen of more regular behaviour are drawn assistance. While the people ran wild, and ex-duced, by the dialogue of the first scene, with with much spirit and wit, and the drama intropressed all the different forms of lamentation, methought a sable cloud overshadowed the whole land, and covered its inhabitants with darkness; no glimpse of light appeared, except one ray from heaven upon the place in which the heroine now secluded herself from the world, with her eyes fixed on those abodes to which her consort was ascended. Methought a long period of time had passed away in mourning and in darkness, when a twilight began by degrees to enlighten the hemisphere; and, looking round me, I saw a boat rowed towards the shore, in which sat a personage adorned with warlike trophies, of Fondlewife is a lively image of the unsea- from Holland, with the preliminaries of a peace. † By Congreve. His first play, and first acted in 1693. |