« PreviousContinue »
Unfit to hear mun allege, do mord blood,
That so degenerate a strain as this,
Hect. Paris, and Troilus, you have both said well;
Tro. Why, there you touch'd the life of our design : Were it not glory that we more affected Than the performance of our heaving spleens, I would not wish a drop of Trojan blood Spent more in her defence. But, worthy Hector, She is a theme of honour and renown: A spur to valiant and magnanimous deeds; Whose present courage may beat down our foes, And fame, in time to come, canonizę us : For, I presume, brave Hector would not lose So rich advantage of a promis d glory, . As smiles upon the forehead of this action, For the wide world's revenue. Hect.
; I am yours,
Enter THERSITES, Ther. How now, Thersites? what, lost in the labyrinth of thy fury? Shall the elephant Ajax carry it thus? he beats me, and I rail at bim: 0 worthy satisfaction! 'would, it were otherwise ; that I could beat him, whilst he railed at me: 'Sfoot, I'll learn to conjure and raise devils, but I'll see some issue of my spiteful execrations. Then there's Achilles,--a' rare engineer. If Troy be not taken till these two undermine it, the walls will stand till they fall of themselves. O thou great thunderdarter of Olympus, forget that thou art Jove, the king of gods; and, Mercury, lose all the serpentine craft of thy Caduceus; if ye take not that little little less-thanlittle wit from them that they have! which short-armed ignorance itself knows is so abundant scarce, it will not in circumvention deliver a fly from a spider, without drawing their massy irons, and cutting the web. After this, the vengeance on the whole camp! or, rather, the bone-ache! for that, methinks, is the curse dependant on those that war for a placket. I have said my prayers; and devil, envy, say Amen. What, ho! my lord Achilles!
Enter PATROCLUS. Patr. Who's there? Thersites? Good Thersites, come in and rail.
Ther. If I could have remembered a gilt counterfeit, thou wouldst not have slipped out of my contemplation : but it is no matter; Thyself upon thyself! The common curse of mankind, folly and ignorance, be thine in great revenue! heaven bless thee from a tutor, and discipline come not near thee! Let thy blood be thy direction till thy death! then if she, that lays thee out, says—Thou art a fair corse, I'll be sworn and sworn upon’t, she never shrouded any but lazars. Amen. -Where's Achilles ?
Patr. What, art thou devout? wast thou in prayer?
Achil. Where, where?--Art thou come? Why, my cheese, my digestion, why hast thou not served thyself in to my table so many ineals? Come; what's Agamemnon?.
Ther. Thy commander, Achilles;—Then tell me, Patroclus, what's Achilles ?
Patr. Thy lord, Thersites; Then tell me, I pray thee, what's thyself?
Ther. Thy knower, Patroclus; Then tell me, Patroclus, what art thou?
Patr: Thou mayest tell, that knowest.
Ther. I'll decline the whole question. Agamemnon commands Achilles; Achilles is my lord; I am Patroclus' knower; and Patroclus is a fool.
Patr. You rascal!
Ther. Agamemnon is a fool; Achilles is a fool; Thersites is a fool; and, as aforesaid, Patroclus is a fool.
Achil. Derive this; come.
Ther. Agamemnon is a fool to offer to command Achilles ; Achilles is a fool to be commanded of Agamempon; Thersites is a fool to serve such a fool; and Patroclus is a fool positive.
Patr. Why am I a fool?
Ther. Make that demand of the prover.-It suffices me, thou art. Look you, who comes here? Enter AGAMEMNON, ULYSSES, NESTOR, DIOMEDES,
and AJAX. Achil. Patroclus, I'll speak with nobody ;-Come in with me, Thersites.
[Exit. Ther. Here is such patchery, such joggling, and such knavery! all the argument is, a cuckold, and a whore; A good quarrel, to draw emulous factions, and bleed to h upon. Now
dry serpigo on the subject! and war, and lechery, confound all! . [Exit.
Agam. Where is Achilles? !
Agam. Let it be known to him, that we are here.
I shall say so to him. [Exit.
Ajax. Yes, lion-sick, sick of proud heart: you may call it melancholy, if you will favour the man; but, by my head, 'tis pride: But why, why? let him show us a cause. - A word, my lord.
Takės Agamemnon aside. Nest. What moves Ajax thus to bay at him?
Ulyss. Achilles hath inveigled his fool from him.
Nest. Then will Ajax lack matter, if he have lost his argument. "
Ulyss. No; you see, he is his argument, that' has his argument; Achilles. i'i'
Nest. All the better; their fraction is more our wish, than their faction: But it was a strong composure, à fool could disunite."
Ulyss. The amity, that wisdom knits not, folly may easily untie. Here comes Patroclus. : !.. . !
.. . Re-enter PATROCLUŞ.,..! Nest. No Achilles with him.
Ulyss. The elephant hath joints, but none for courtesy: his legs are legs for necessity, not for flexarel
Patr. Achilles bids me say—he is much sorry, 1 If any thing more than your sport and pleasure . i' Did move your greatness, and this noble state, si To call upon him;' he hopes, it is no other, i si But for your health and your digestion sake, ii An after-dinner's breath.
L ib. Agam. '. I Hear you, Patroclus;-... We are too well acquainted with these answers : : But his evasion, wing'd thus swift with scorn,.,.' Cannot outfly our apprehensions. rin Much attribute he hath; and much the reason.' ' Why we ascribe it to him: yet all his virtues, + Not virtuously on his own part beheld; ir Do, in our eyes, begin to lose their gloss; ! Yea, like fair fruit in an unwholesome dish,': .. Are like to rot untasted. Go and tell him, ili We come to speak with him: And you shall not sin, i If you do say:-we think him over-proud, And under-honest; in self-assumption greater, Than in the note of judginent; and worthier than him
self.. . Here tend the savage strangeness he puts on;...'). Disguise the holy strength of their command, il