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I only give you advice, and tell you how I would act, if I was in your place.

Har. I assure you, Sir, I am quite charm'd with the advice; and since you are ready to stand my friend, I am determined to follow it.

Col. You are
Har. Positively-

320 Col. Say no more then; here's my hand :-You understand me-No occasion to talk any further of it at present-When we are alone-Dy, take Mr. Harman into the drawing-room, and give him some tea. -I say, Harman, Mum.

Har. O, Sir.

Col. What do you mean by your grave looks, mistress?


How cursedly vext the old fellow will be,

When he finds you have snapt up his daughter;
But shift as he will, leave the matter to me,

And I warrant you soon shall have caught her.

What a plague and a pox,
Shall an ill natur'd fox
Prevent youth and beauty

From doing their duty ?
He ought to be set in the stocks.

He merits the law;

And if we can't bite him,
By gad we'll indite him.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!





Dian. Sir, I desire to know what gross acts of imprudence have ever discovered in me, to authorize you in this licence, or make you imagine I should yot shew such marks of my resentment as your monstrous treatment of me deserves.

Har. Nay, my dear Diana, I confess I have been rather too bold ;-but consider, I languish'd to see you: and when an opportunity offerid to give me that pleasure without running any risque, either of your quiet or reputation, how hard was it to be resisted ? 'Tis true, I little thought my visit would be attended with such happy consequences as it now seems to promise.

Dian. What do you mean?

Har. Why, don't you see your father has an inclia nation I should run away with you, and is contriving the means himself?

Dian. And do you think me capable of concurring? Do you think I have no more duty ?



Har. I don't know that, Madam; I am sure your refusing to seize such an opportunity to make me happy, gives evident proofs that you


Dian. If there is no way to convince you


my love but by my indiscretion, you are welcome to consider it in what light you please.

Har. Was ever so unfortunate a dog ?

Dian. Very pretty this upon my word; but is it possible you can be in earnest ?

370 Har. It is a matter of too much consequence to jest about.

Dian. And you seriously think I ought

Har. You are sensible there are no hopes of your father's cooly and wittingly consenting to our marriage; chance has thrown in our way a whimsical method of surprizing him into a compliance, and why should not we avail ourselves of it?

Dian. And so you would have me
Har. I shall say no more, Ma'am.

Dian. Nay, but, for Heaven's sake
Har. No, Madam, no; I have done.

Dian. And are you positively in this violent fuss about the matter, or only giving yourself airs ?

Har. You may suppose what you think proper, Madam.

Dian. Well, come ;- let us go into the drawingroom and drink tea, and afterwards we'll talk of


Har. I won't drink any tea.


Dian. Why so?
Har. Because I don't like it.
Dian. Not like it! Ridiculous.
Har. I wish you would let me alone.
Dian. Nay, pr’ythee
Har. I won't.

Dian. Well, will you, if I consent to act as you please?

Har. I don't know whether I will or not.
Dian. Ha, ha, ha, poor Harman.


Come then, pining, peevish lover,

Tell me what to do and say ;
From your doleful dumps recover,

Smile, and it shall have its way.

With their humours, thus to teaze us,

Men are sure the strangest elves !
Silly creatures, would you please us,

You should still seem pleas'd yourselves.


HARMAN. Say'st thou so, my girl! Then Love renounce me, if I drive not old Truepenny's humour to the uttermost.-Let me consider ;-what ill consequence can possibly attend it?—The design is his own, as in part will be the execution. He may perhaps be angry when he finds out the deceit.-Well ;-he deceives himself; and faults we commit ourselves, we seldom find much difficulty in pardoning.


Hence with caution, hence with fear,

Beauty prompts, and nought shall stay me;
Boldly for that prize I steer ;
Rocks, nor winds, nor waves dismay me.


Yet, rash lover, look behind,

Think what evils may betide you ;
Love and fortune both are blind,

And you have none else to guide you.


Changes to a handsome Dressing-room, supposed to be

CLARISSA's. On one side, between the Wings, is a Table with a Glass, Boxes, and two Chairs. DIANA enters before JessAMY.

Dian. Come, brother, I undertake to be mistress of the ceremony upon this occasion, and introduce you to your first audience.--Miss Flowerdale is not here, I perceive; but no matter.

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