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Fall. Well, thou wilt be horribly chidde to morrow when thou commeft to thy father: if thou doe loue me, practife an answere.

Prin. Doe thou ftand for my father, and examine me vpon the particulars of my life.

Fal. Shall I content: this chaire fhall be my ftate, this dagger my fcepter, and this cufhin my crowne.

Prin. Thy ftate is taken for a ioynd ftole, thy golden fcepter for a leaden dagger, and thy precious rich crowne, for a pittifull bald crowne.

Fal. Well, and the fire of grace be not quite out of thee, now fhalt thou be moued. Giue mee a cuppe of facke to make mine eyes looke redde, that it may be thought I haue wept, for I must speake in passion, and I will doe it in king Cambifes vaine.

Prince. Well, here is my legge.

Falf. And here is my speech: ftand aside nobilitie.

Ho. O lefu, this is excellent fport, yfayth.

Fal. Weepe not sweete queene, for trickling teares are vaine.

Ho. O the father, how he holdes his countenance ?
Fal. For Gods fake lords, conuey my truftfull qeene:
For teares doe ftop the floud-gates of her eyes.

Ho. O Iefu, he doth it as like one of thefe harlotry players, as euer I fee.

Fal. Peace good pint-pot, peace good tickle braine.

Harry. I doe not onely maruell where thou spendest thy time, but also, how thou art accompanied: for though the cammomile the more it is troden, the fafter it growes; yet * youth, the more it is wafted, the fooner it weares: thou † art my fonne, I haue partly thy mothers word, partly my ‡ opinion; but chiefly a villanous tricke of thine eye, and a foolish hanging of thy neather lip, that doth warrant me. If then thou be fonne to me, here lieth the point; why, being

fonne to me, art thou fo poynted at? fhall the bleffed fonne of heauen proue a micher, and eate black-berries? a queftion not to be afkt. Shall the fonne of England proue a thiefe, and take purfes? a queftion to be afkt. There is a thing, Harry, which thou haft often heard of, and it is knowne to many in our land, by the name of pitch; this pitch (as ancient writers do report) doth defile? fo doth the company thou keepest: for Harry, now I do not fpeake to thee in drinke, but in teares? not in pleasure, but in paffion; not in wordes onely, but in woes alfo and yet there is a vertuous man, whom I haué often noted in thy company, but I know not his name.

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Prin. What manner of man, and it like your maiestie ?

Fal. A good portly man yfaith, and a-corpulent, of a cheerfull looke, a pleasing eye, and a most noble cariage, and as I thinke, his age fome fifty, or birlady, inclining to threescore, and now I remember me, his name is Falstaffe: if that man fhold be lewdly giuen, he deceiues* me. For Harry, I fee vertue in his lookes; if then the tree may be knowne by the fruite, as the fruite by the tree, then peremptorily I fpeake it, there is vertue in that Falstaffe, him keepe with, the reft banish and tell mee now, thou naughty varlet, tell mee, where hast thou been this month?

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Prin. Doft thou fpeake like a king? doe thou ftand for mee, and Ile play my father.

Fal. Depofe me, if thou doft it halfe fo grauely, fo maiefti cally both in word and matter, hang mee vp by the heeles for a rabbet-fucker, or a poulters hare.

Prin. Well, heere I am fet.

Falf. And heere I ftand, iudge my maifters.

Prin. Now Harry, whence come you?

Falf. My noble lord, from Eaftcheape.

Prin. The complaints I heare of thee, are grieuous.

⚫ deceiveth.

Falf.

Falf. Zbloud my lord, they are falfe: nay, Ile tickle ye for a young prince yfaith.

Prin. Sweareft thou, vngracious boy? henceforth nere looke on me, thou art violently carried away from grace, there is a diuell hauntes thee in the likenesse of a fat old man, a tun of man is thy companion: why doft thou conuerfe with that trunke of humors, that boulting-hutch of beaftlineffe, that fwolne parcel of dropfies, that huge bombard of facke, that ftuft cloke-bag of guttes, that rofted Manning tree oxe with the pudding in his belly, that reuerent vice, that gray iniquitie, that father ruffian, that vanity in yeares: wherein is he good, but to tafte facke and drinke it? wherein neate and clenly, but to carue a capon and eate it? wherein cunning, but in craft? wherein craftie, but in villanie? wherein villanous, but in all things? wherein worthy, but in nothing? Fal. I would your grace would take mee with you: whom meanes your grace?

Prin. That villanous abhominable misleader of youth, Falftalfe, that old white bearded Sathan.

Fal. My lord, the man I know.

Prin. I know thou doft.

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Fal. But to fay, I know more harme in him then in my felfe, were to fay more then I know: that he is old (the more the pittie) his white haires do witneffe it: but that he is (fauing your reuerence) a whoremafter, that I vtterly deny if facke and fugar be a fault, God helpe the wicked: if to be old and merry be a finne, then many an hold host * that I know, is damn'd: if to be fatte, be to be hated, then Pharaos leane kine are to be loued. No, my good lord, banisa Peto, banish Bardol, banish Poines; but for fweete lacke Falftale, kind Iacke Falstaffe, true Iacke Falstaffe, valiant Lacke Falftalfe, and therefore more valiant, being as hee is old Laske Falftalfe, banish not him thy Harries company, ba

caft.

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nish not him thy Harries company; banish plumpe Iacke, and banish all the world.

Prin. I doe, I will.

Enter Bardoll running.

Bar. O, my lord, my lord, the shriefe, with a most monftrous watch is at the doorc.

Fal. Out you rogue, play out the play: I haue much to fay in the behalfe of that Falftalffe.

Enter the hofteffe.

Hof. O Iefu, my lord, my lord!

Fal. Heigh, heigh, the diuell rides vpon a fiddle-fticke, what's the matter?

Hof. The fherife and all the watch are at the doore, they are come to fearch the house, fhall I let them in ?

Falf. Doest thou heare Hal? neuer call a true peece of gold a counterfeit, thou art effentially made, without feeming fo. Prin. And thou a naturall coward, without inftinct.

Falf. I deny your maior; if you will deny the fherife, fo, if not, let him enter. If I become not a cart as wel as another man, a plague on my bringing vp: I hope I fhall as foone be ftrangled with a halter as an other.

Prin. Go hide thee behinde the arras, the reft walke vp a boue. Now my maifters, for a true face and good confci

ence.

Fal. Both which I haue had; but their date is out, and therefore Ile hide me.

Prin. Call in the sherife.

Enter fberife and the carrier.

Prin. Now maister sherife, what is your will with me?

Sher.

Sher. First, pardon me, my lord. A hue and cry hath followed certaine men vnto this house.

Prin. What men ?

Sher. One of them is well knowne, my gracious lord, a groffe fatte man.

Car. As fatte as butter.

Prin. The man, I doe affure you is not heere,
For I my felfe at this time haue imployed him:
And sheriffe I will ingage my word to thee,
That I will by to morrow dinner time,
Send him to answere thee or any man,
For any thing he fhall be charg'd withall,
And fo let me intreat you leaue the house.

Sher. I will my lord, there are two gentlemen
Haue in this robbery loft 300 *. markes.

Prin. It may be fo: if he have rob'd these men He shall be anfwerable: and fo farewell.

Sher. Good night my noble lord.

Prin. I thinke it is good morrow, is it not?

Sher. Indeed my lord, I thinke it be two a clock.

Exit. Prin. This oyly rafcall is knowne as well as Poules: goe call him forth.

Peto. Falftalffe? fast a sleepe behind the arras, and fnorting like a horse.

Prin. Hark, how hard he fetches breath, fearch his pockets.

He fearcheth his pockets, and findeth certaine papers.

Prin. What haft thou found?

Peto. Nothing but papers my lord.

Prin. Lets fee what be they: reade them.

3000. + vii.