THE GHOSTS ON THE VICTORIA TOWER.

'TIS twelve o'clock by St. Margaret's bell,

And the ghosts of St. Margaret's burial-ground
You may know the locality by the smell)

Are beginning to rise for their midnight round.
Parliament Street is dreary and dead,
And hollow falls the policeman's tread,
And well-doing people are warm in bed;
Only there's waking in Westminster slum,
And Broadway tavern, and Pye Street den,
Where the flaring gaslights fitfully come
On slatternly drabs and ruffianly men;
And there's waking, too, of another sort,
In another house of doubtful report,

Where the Commons are met, and the Speaker is set,

With some little bills to dispose of yet;

And the Members are feeling excessively ill,
With BARRY'S alternate hot-blast and chill;
And the head-achy lamps burn hot and hotter,
And talkative M.P.s prose and potter,
And weary reporters doze at their notes,
And tired-out Tellers miscount the votes ;
But every one feels that it's no great matter
In the part of the evening called "the latter,"
For it's only the Estimates that they're voting,
And "how the money goes" needs no noting.
O'erhead, enjoying the hush of the hour,
Two Ghosts sit upon the Victoria Tower-
And it needs no conjuror to reveal

They're the Ghosts of BENTINCK and ROBERT PEEL,
Still haunting the spot, by leave of the Fates,

To take posthumous notes of the Commons' debates,
And discuss, as they did in the days that are gone,
Of Free Trade and Protection the pro and con.

Says the Ghost of PEEL, "You 're bound to admit
My Free Trade measures have been a hit;

Capital's gathering cent. per cent."

"That's true," quoth BENTINCK's Ghost, "but RENT!" Says the Ghost of PEEL, "The Revenue 's rising

In a style that, even to me, is surprising;

Our imports increase to a vast extent"

"That's true," quoth BENTINCK's Ghost; "but RENT!"

Quoth the Ghost of PEEL, "It plainly appears,

Five million taxes have gone in six years;

And yet there's a surplus-that is, there was meant

To have been one; but to the Cape it went"

"That's true," quoth BENTINCK's Ghost; "but RENT!"
Quoth the Ghost of PEEL, "Since Forty-two
We've doubled Consumption and Exports, too;
And somehow we eat all the food that's sent
That's true," quoth BENTINCK's Ghost;
Quoth the Ghost of PEEL, "Our wages keep up;
The poor have cheap sugar to sweeten their cup,
And a bigger and lower-priced loaf to eat,

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And a larger allowance of butcher's meat;

In short, all is plenty, peace, and content"

but RENT!"

"That's true;" quoth BENTINCK's Ghost; "but RENT!"
Quoth the Ghost of PEEL, "This is really too strong-
Is there no other burden but this to your song?

To answer my reasons I thought you meant."
RENT!"

quoth BENTINCK's Ghost, "RENT!! RENT!!! RENT!!!! RENT!!!!!"

Whereat, with a frown of his shadowy brow,
The Ghost of PEEL made a stiffish bow.
"I see," quoth he, "'tis answer enow-
For in those four letters is summed the reply

To all the figures and facts that lie

In Revenue tables and Custom House tomes,
In employers' ledgers, and workmen's homes;
In those four letters is writ the doom

Of the party that rallies around your tomb:
And 'twere well for England were that the worst
That is written in those four letters accurst.
But more is in them-there's civil strife,
And war betwixt classes-yea, war to the knife;
Election orgies, and aimless debate,

And rich men's scorn, and poor men's hate;

And it may be there's writ at the bottom of all,

In those four letters-your order's fall!

Oh! woe to me, and woe to you,

If ever these words of mine come true

But, on England's tomb, in that grievous event,

You may carve the four letters that make up RENT!"

party-not as he thinks, but as his party thinks. Doesn't listen to the debates-it might prejudice him. Infinitely prefers his chop at BELLAMY'S.

Votes with his

Of all parties, likes an evening party best, next to a dinner-party. Thinks a seat in the House precious hard work-so hard, that unless

a Financial Debate is going on, it is impossible to sleep upon it. Belongs to a Club, of course-very convenient for his letters, and safe retreat from country visitors. "MR. EMPPIE at home, Sir ?" "No, Sir. Gone to the Club."

Attends a Committee, when compelled, and writes his correspondence there.

Never suffers his mind to be confused, by allowing an argument for one minute to dwell upon it.

Keeps his thoughts and opinions from the view of others, by never speaking a word.

Is most loud and explicit, however, whenever he cries "Hear!" Leaves nothing of consequence to memory which he can and ought to commit to writing; so, in asking for an appointment, he always writes in for it..

Never forgets a service he pays the Government.
Never omits to tell the Government so.

Keeps a memorandum-book, in which he notes every appointment or situation that is likely to be vacant, and with the price attached to each.

Likes an ambassadorship best, a long way off, where there is little to do, no one to know how you do it, and a good liberal sum given for it. Is equally obliging in attending and leaving the House; but greatly prefers the latter.

Holds that a vote is a sacred obligation, which no Member should part with lightly before he has seriously considered how it is likely to affect his interests.

Balances regularly the state of parties, and serves that party with the greatest zeal which has the most to give.

Holds it as a maxim that that Government is not worthy to be supported which does not support its own followers.

Coughs, barks, brays, crows, neighs, on the shortest notice, as a matter of course.

Let the Business-Member of Parliament act strictly to these habits, and he must succeed.

He must try his hardest, do his strongest, and take whatever comes.

THE NEW TORIES.-The Tories of the present day, inasmuch as they represent the territorial interest, may be called the Terri-tories.

THE DANGEROUS ANIMALS BILL.

WE do not wonder at the Government opposition to this Bill; for if the Ministers undertake to deal with dangerous animals, they may be asked what they intend to do with the few remaining rabid Protectionists. One of the clauses had reference to farmers keeping savage bulls; but though the farmers have really been enough to make JOHN BULL rather savage at times, it is only by putting restrictions upon him that he is likely to become a dangerous animal. There was a little fun caused by the ATTORNEY GENERAL during the debate, but the report might have been richer, and we therefore supply a few of the principal omissions.

COLONEL SIBTHORP, hearing that rabid animals might be destroyed according to the present law, wished to know whether that mad wag Punch might not at once be destroyed as a dangerous animal. MR. DRUMMOND would be glad to know if the Pope's insane Bulls might not be included in the measure.

MR. ALDERMAN HUMPHERY would suggest that March Hares should have a clause devoted to them.

MR. ROEBUCK had personally no objection to the Bill; indeed, he would carry it farther, and would introduce a provision for helping a lame dog over a stile, which he thought would be a suggestion of which Ministers would be glad to avail themselves.

COLONEL SIBTHORP was anxious for information as to the clause relating to dog-carts, which he understood to be already in operation within the Metropolis. Now, several military friends of his-Members of the House-were in the habit of coming down to that House in dog-carts, though he was sure they would not wilfully incur a penalty (Hear).

COLONEL THOMPSON feared that the House did not understand the subject of dogs. If there were any idle puppies sauntering about the

ON Monday, last week, a remarkable execution took place. "WILLIAM KALABERGO this morning suffered the extreme penalty of the law, over the Chapel, at the County Gaol at Oxford."

Thus writes the reporter of the Times, and he subsequently states that

"The procession to the place of execution passed down the cell stairs, across the yard, and up into the Chapel, in which, in front of the communion-table, the pinioning took place." Authority, then, has, once for all, pronounced its decision on the question of capital punishment. It has declared the execution of a criminal to be not only allowable, or merely just, but a holy solemnity. doxy, a man has been hanged over a Chapel, after having been pinioned What else are we to think, now that at Oxford, the very seat of orthoin front of the communion-table?

Parliamentary Privacy.

IF LOUIS NAPOLEON wishes thoroughly to stifle the discussion, and to prevent the publication of the debates that occur in his Senate and Legislative corps, he should cause the Chambers in which those bodies meet, to be constructed and ventilated after the fashion of the British Houses of Parliament; so that the assembly might be close, and the speakers inaudible in the gallery.