16 STORY the fafety of our trade and plantations to France and Spain. Can this author think, can any man think, that the peace of Europe, or of this nation, was preferved even in the interrupted manner it was preferved, by the fuhfidies we paid to the little princes of Germany? No. It was, during the whole period, he mentions, preferved by our continuing to facrifice the houfe of Auftria to the house of Bourbon, and by fubmitting tamely to all the incroachments made by the French upon our plantations in America, and to all the depredations and infults committed by the Spaniards upon our trade and navigation in that part of the world. It was this that made the prefent war unavoidable: It was this, joined with the ridiculous connections we were led into at the beginning of it, by the Eleves of this author's favourite minifter, that has made the prefent war fo dangerous, fo heavy, and fo expensive. With nations it is the fame as with private men: If you fubmit tamely to one infult or incroachment, you may expect a frequent repetition, until you are brought into a state of abfolute flavery and contempt; and if you ever do attempt to recover, the longer you have fubmitted, the more dangerous, the more difficult, you will find it to recover your liberty, your honour, or your estate." I am, SIR, London, Jan. 25, 1762. your &c. The Story of LE FEVER, I T was fome time in the fummer of that year in which Dendermond was taken by the allies, which was about seven years before my father came into the country, and about as many, after the time, that my uncle Toby and Trim had privately decamped from my father's house in town, in order to lay fome of the finest fieges to fome of the finest fortified cities in Europe-when my uncle Toby was one evening gettinghis fupper, with Trim fitting behind him at a mall fideboard, fay, fitting for in confideration of the corporal's lame knee (which fometimes gave him exquifite pain) when my uncle Toby dined or fupped alone, he would never fuffer the corporal to ftand: and the poor fellow's veneration for his mafter was fnch, that, with a proper artillery, my uncle Toby * could have taken Dendermond itself, with lefs trouble than he was able to gain this point over him; for many a time when my uncle Toby fuppofed the corporal's leg was at reft, he would look back, and detect him ftanding behind with the moft dutiful refpect: This bred more little fquabbles betwixt them, than all other caufes for five and twenty years tegether But this is neither here nor therewhy do I mention it:-Ask my pen,it governs me,I govern not it. # He was one evening fitting thus at his fupper, when the landlord of a little inn in the village came into the parlour with an empty phial in his hand, to beg a glafs or two of lack; 'Tis for a poor gentleman, I think, of the army, faid the landlord, who has been taken ill at my house four days ago, and has never held up his head fince, or had a defire to tafte any thing, till just now, that he has a fancy for a glafs of fack and a thin toast,I think, fays he, taking his hand from his forehead, it would comfort me. -If I could neither beg, borrow, or buy fuch a thing,added the landlord, -I would almoft fteal for the poor gentleman, he is fo ill.I hope in God he will ftill mend, continued he, we are all of us concerned for him. Thou art a good-natur'd foul, I will answer for thee, cried my uncle Toby ; and thou shalt drink the poor gentleman's health in a glafs of fack thyfelf—and take a couple of bottles with my service, and tell him he is heartily welcome to them, and to a dozen more if they will do him good. Though I am perfuaded, faid my uncle Toby, as the landlord thut the door, he is a very compaffionate fellow-Trim, -yet I cannot help entertaining a high opinion of his gueft too; there must be fomething more than common in him, that in fo fhort a time should win fo much upon the affections of his hoft;-And of his whole family added the corporal, name. -I have quite forgot it, truly, faid the landlord, coming back into the parlour with the corporal,-but I can ask his fon again: Has he a fon with him then? faid my uncle Toby.-A boy, replied the landlord, of about eleven or twelve years of For fome further particulars of this fleafing character, fee our Vol. for 1760, p. 11, fee also 1761, p. 100—1928 1762. LE FEVER. of age; but the poor creature has tafted almost as little as his father; he does nothing but mourn and lament for him night and day :-He has not stirred from the beduide these two days. My uncle Toby laid down his knife and fork, and thruft his plate from before him, as the landlord gave him the account; and Trim, without being ordered, took away without faying one word, and in a few minutes after brought him his pipe and tobacco. Stay in the room a little, faid my uncle Toby. Trim!-faid my uncle Toby, after he lighted his pipe, and fmoaked about a dozen.-Trim came in front of his mafter and made his bow;-my uncle Toby fmoak'd on, and faid no more.-Corporall faid my uncle Toby-the corporal made his bow.My uncle Toby proceeded no farther, but finithed his pipe. Trim! faid my uncle Toby, I have a project in my head, as it is a bad night, of wrapping myself up warm in my roquelaure, and paying a vifit to this poor gentleman.-Your honour's roquelaure, replied the corporal, has not once been had on, fince the night before your honour received your wound, when we mounted guard in the trenches before the gate of St. Nicholas;—and besides it is fo cold and rainy a night, that what with the roquelaure, and what with the weather, it will be enough to give your honour your death, and bring on your honour's torment in your groin. I fear fo; replied my uncle Toby, but I am not at reft in my mind, Trim, fince the account the landlord has given me.-I wish I had not known fo much of this affair,-added my uncle Toby,-or that I had known more of it :-How fhall we manage it? Leave it, an't please your honour, to me, quoth the corporal;-I'll take my hat and ftick, and go to the house and reconnoitre, and act accordingly; and I will bring your honour a full account in an hour.-Thou fhalt go, Trim, faid my uncle Toby, and here's a fhilling for thee to drink with his fervant.-I thail get it all cut of him, faid the corporal, shutting the door. My uncle Toby filled his fecond pipe; and had it not been, that he now and then wandered from the point, with confidering whether it was not full as well to have the curtain of the tenaile a straight line, as a crooked one, he might be faid to have thought of nothing clie but poor Le January, 1752. 17 Fever and his boy the whole time he finoaked it. It was not till my uncle Toby had knocked the afhes out of his third pipe, that corporal Trim returned from the inn, and gave him the following account. I defpaired at first, faid the corporal, of being able to bring back your honour any kind of intelligence concerning the poor fick lieutenant-Is he in the army then? faid my uncle Toby-He is: faid the corporal-And in what regiment ? faid my uncle Toby-I'll tell your honour, replied the corporal, every thing ftraight forwards, as I learnt it. Then, Trim, I'll fill another pipe, faid my uncle Toby, and not interupt thee till thou haft done; fo fit down at thy ease, Trim, in the window feat, and begin thy ftory again. The corporal made his old bow, which generally fpoke as plain as a bow could fpeak it-Your bonour is good:And having done that, he fat down, as he was ordered,-and begun the story to my uncle Toby over again in pretty near the fame words. I defpaired at firft, faid the corporal, of being able to bring back any intelligence to your honour, about the lieutenant and his fon; for when I asked where his fervant was, from whom I made myfelf fure of knowing every thing that was proper to be asked, That's a right diAtinction, Trim, faid my uncle Toby-I was answered, an' pleafe your honour, that he had no fervant with him;-that he had come to the inn with hired horfes, which, upon finding himself unable to proceed (to join, I fuppofe, the regiment) he had difmiffed the morning after he came.-If I get better, my dear, faid he, as he gave his purfe to his fon to pay the man, we can hire horfes from hence.But alas the poor gentleman will never get from hence, faid the landlady to me, for I heard the death-watch all night long ;-and when he dies, the youth, his fon, will certainly die with him; for he is broken-hearted already. I was hearing this account, continued the corporal, when the youth came into the kitchen, to order the thin tout the landlord fpoke of;-But I will dɔ it for my father myself, faid the youth.-Play let me fave you the trouble, young gentleman, faid I, taking up a fork for the purpose, and offering my chair to fit down upon by the fire, whilst I did it.-I believe, Sir, faid he, very modeftly, I can pleate him beft myfl-I am fure, fald I, 18 TRIM's affecting Intelligence. I, his honour will not like the toast the worfe for being toafted by an old foldier. The youth took hold of my hand, and inftantly burst into tears.--Poor youth! faid my uncle Toby, he has been bred up from an infant in the army, and the name of a foldier, Trim, founded in his ears like the name of a friend ;-I wish I had him here. I never, in the longest march, faid the corporal, had fo great a mind to my dinner, as I had to cry with him for company :- -What could be the matter with me, an' please your honour? Nothing in the world, Trim, faid my uncle Toby, blowing his nofe,-but that thou art a good-natured fellow. When I gave him the toast, continued the corporal, I thought it was proper to tell him I was Captain Shandy's fervant, and that your honour (though a ftranger) was extremely concerned for his father; and that if there was any thing in your houfe or cellar-(and thou might'ft have added my purse too, faid my uncle Toby) he was heartily welcome to it: He made a very low bow (which was meant to your honour) but no answer,for his heart was full-fo he went up tairs with the toaft;-I warrant you, my dear, faid I, as I opened the kitchen door, your father will be well again. Mr. Yorick's curate was fimoaking a pipe by the kitchen fire,—but said not a word good or bad to comfort the youth.—I thought it wrong; added the corporalI think fo too, faid my uncle Toby. When the lieutenant had taken his glafs of sack and toast, he felt himself a little revived, and fent down into the kitchen, to let me know, that in about ten minutes he fhould be glad if I would ftep up ftairs. -I believe, faid the landlord, he is going to fay his prayers, for there was a book laid upon the chair by his bedfide, and as I fhut the door, I faw his fon take up a cushion. I thought, faid the curate, that you gentlemen of the army, Mr. Trim, never faid your prayers at all. I heard the poor gentleman fay his prayers last night, faid the landlady, very devoutly, and with my own ears, or I could not have believed it. Are you fure of it? replied the curate.-A foldier, an' please your reverence, faid I, prays as often (of his own accord) as a parfon and when he is fighting for his king, and for his own life, and for his honour too, he has the moft reafon to pray to God, of any one Jan. in the whole world-Twas well faid of thee, Trim, said my uncle Toby.—But when a foldier, faid I, an' please your reverence, has been standing for twelve hours together in the trenches, up to his knees in cold water,--or engaged, faid I, for months together in long and dangerous marches;harraffed, perhaps, in his rear to-day-harraffing others tomorrow;- detached here ;-countermanded there;refting this night out upon his arms-beat up in his fhirt the next;-benumbed in his joints ;—perhaps without ftraw in his tent to kneel on ;he muft fay his prayers how and when he can. I believe, faid I,-for I was piqued, quoth the corporal, for the reputation of the army,I believe, an' please your reverence, faid I, that when a foldier gets time to pray, he prays as heartily as a parfon,-though not with all his fufs and hypocrify.Thou shouldft not have said that, Trim, faid my uncle Toby,-for God only knows who is a hypocrite, and who is not :-At the great and general review of us all, corporal, at the day of judgment (and not till then) it will be feen who has done their duties in this world, and who has not; and we shall be advanced, Trim, accordingly.-I hope we fhall, faid Trim.-It is in the fcripture, faid my uncle Toby; and I will fhew it thee to-morrow :-In the mean time we may depend upon it, Trim, for our comfort, faid my uncle Toby, that God Almighty is fo good and just a go vernor of the world, that if we have but done our duties in it,it will never be enquired into, whether we have done them in a red coat or a black one:--I hope not; faid the corporal-But go on, Trim, faid my uncle Toby, with thy story. When I went up, continued the corporal, into the lieutenant's room, which I did not do till the expiration of the ten minutes, he was lying in his bed with his head raised upon his hand, with his elbow upon the pillow, and a clean white cambrick handkerchief befide it :-The youth was juft ftooping down to take up the cushion, upon which I fuppofed he had been kneeling, the book was laid upon the bed, and as he rofe, in taking up the cushion with one hand, he reached out his other to take it away at the fame time. Let it remain there, my dear, faid the lieutenant. He did not offer to speak to me, till I had walked up clofe to his bed-fide:-1£ you 1762. UNCLE TOBY's great Senfibility. you are captain Shandy's fervant, faid he, I wifh, faid my uncle Toby, with a deep figh,-I wish, Trim, I was afleep. Your honour, replied the corporal, is too much concerned ;-fhall I pour your honour out a glafs of fack to your pipe? -Do, Trim, faid my uncle Toby. I remember, faid my uncle Toby, fighing again, the ftory of the enlign and his wife, with a circumftance his modefty omitted;—and particularly well that he, as well as the, upon fome account or other (I forget what) was univerfally pitied by the whole regiment ;-but finish the story thou art upon:-'Tis finished already, faid the corporal,for I could ay no longer,-fo wifhed his honour a good night; young Le Fever rofe from off the bed, and law me to the bottom of the stairs; and as we went down toge ther, told me, they had come from Ireland, and were on their route to join the regiment in Flanders.But alas! faid the corporal, the lieutenant's last day's march is over.Then what is to become of his poor boy? cried my uncle Toby. It was to my uncle Toby's eternal ho 19 nour, though I tell it only for the fake of thofe, who, when coop'd in betwixt a natural and a pofitive law, know notfo their fouls, which way in the world to turn themselves-That, notwithstanding my uncle Toby was warmly engaged at that time in carrying on the fiege of Dendermond, parallel with the allies, who preffed theirs on fo vigorously, that they fcarce allowed him time to get his dinner —that nevertheless he gave up Dendermond, though he had already made a lodgment upon the counterfcarp; and bent his whole thoughts towards the private diftreffes at the inn; and, except that he ordered the garden gate to be bolted up, by which he might be faid to have turned the fiege of Dendermond into a blockade, he left Dendermond to it, felf, to be relieved or not by the French king, as the French king thought good; and only confidered how he himself should relieve the poor lieutenant and his fon. -That kind BEING, who is a friend to the friendlefs, fhall recompence thee for this. Thou haft left this matter fhort, faid my uncle Toby to the corporal, as he was putting him to bed,-and I will tell thee in what, Tim.-In the first place, when thou madeft an offer of my fervices to Le Fever, ——as ficknefs and travelling are both expenfive, and thou knewest he was but a poor lieutenant, with a fon to fubfift as well as himself, out of his pay, that thou didst not make an offer to him of my purfe; becaufe, had he ftood in need, thou knoweft, Trim, he had been as welcome to it as myself. Your honour knows, faid the corporal, I had no orders;-True, quoth my uncle Toby,-thou didst very right, Trim, as a foldier, but certainly very wrong as a man. In the fecond place, for which, indeed, thou haft the fame excufe, continued my uncle Toby, when thou offeredft him whatever was in my house,-thou should t have offered him my houfe too :-A fick brother officer fhould have the best quarters, Trim, and if we had him with us, we could tend and look to him: -Thou art an excellent nurse thyfelf, Trim,and what with thy care of him, and the old woman's, and his bov's, and mine together, we might recruit him again at once, and fet him upon his legs. In a fortnight or three weeks, added my uncle Toby, fmiling,he might C 2 march 20 DEATH of L'E march. He will never, an' please your honour, in this world, faid the corporal. -He will march, faid my uncle Toby, rifing up from the fide of the bed, with one fhoe off:-An' pleafe your honour, faid the corporal, he will never march but to his grave.-He fhall march, cried 'my uncle Toby, marching the foot which had a fhoe on, though without advancing an inch, --he mall march to his regiment.. -He cannot ftand it, fard the corporal.- -He thall be fupported, faid my uncle Toby.-He'll drop at last, faid the corporal, and what will become of his boy? He fhall not drop, faid my uncle Toby, firmly.-A-well-o'day, -do what we can for him, faid Trim, maintaining his point,the poor foul will die.- -He thall not die, by G, cried my uncle Toby. The Accufing fpirit which flew up to heaven's chancery with the oath, blush'd as he gave it in ;-and the recording Angel, as he wrote it down, dropp'd a tear upon the word, and blotted it out for ever. -My uncle Toby went to his bureau, -put his purfe into his breeches pocket; and having ordered the corporal to go early in the morning for a phyfician,— he went to bed, and fell asleep. The fun looked bright the morning after, to every eye in the village but Le Fever's and his afflicted fon's; the hand of death prefs'd heavy upon his eye-lids, --and hardly could the wheel at the ciftern turn round its circle, when my uncle Toby, who had rofe up an hour before his wonted time, entered the lieutenant's room, and without preface or apology, fat himself down upon the chair by the bed-fide, and independantly of all modes and cuftoms, opered the curtain in the manner an old friend and brother officer would have done it, and afked him how he did, how he had refled in the night, what was his complaint,-where was his pain, and what he could do to help him;-and without giving him time to anfwer any one of the enquiries, went on and told him of the little plan which he had been concerting with the corporal the night before for him. -You fhall go home directly, Le Fever, faid my uncle Toby, to my houfe, -and we'll fend for a doctor to fee what's the matter, and we'll have an apothecary, and the corporal fhall be your nurfeand I'll be your fervant, Le Fever. There was a franknefs in my uncle Toby,-not the effect of familiarity,— but the caufe of it,-which let you at once into his foul, and fhewed you the goodness of his nature; to this there was fomething in his looks and voice, and manner, fuperadded, which eternally beckoned to the unfortunate to come and take shelter under him; fo that before my uncle Toby had half finished the kind offers he was making to the father, had the fon infenfibly preffed up clofe to his knees, and had taken hold of the breaft of his coat, and was pulling it towards him.The blood and fpirits of Le Fever, which were waxing cold and flow within him, and were retreating to their laft citadel, the heart,---rallied back,--the film forfook his eyes for a moment,---he looked up withfully in my uncle Toby's face,--- then caft a look upon his boy,---and that ligament, fine as it was, was never broken.. Nature inftantly ebb'd again,----the film returned to its place---the pulfe fluttered---ftopp'd---went on---throbb'd flopp'd again-moved---stopp'd---shall I go on ---No. My uncle Toby, with young Le Fever in his hand, attended the poor lieutenant, as chief mourners, to his grave. . . . . When my uncle Toby had turned every thing into money, and fettled all accounts betwixt the agent of the regiment and Le Fever, and betwixt Le Fever and all mankind,---there remained nothing more in my uncle Toby's hands, than an old regimental coat and a fword; fo that my uncle Toby found little or no oppofition from the world in taking administration. The coat my uncle Toby gave the corporal; Wear it, Trim, faid my uncle Toby, as long as it will hold together, for the fake of the poor lieutenant---And this,--faid my unele Toby, taking up the word in his hand, and drawing it out of the fcabbard as he fpoke---and this, Le Fever, I'll fave for thee,---'tis all the fortune, continued my uncle Toby, hanging it up upon a crook, and pointing to it,---'tis all the fortune, my dear Le Fever, which God has left thee; but if he has given thee a heart to fight thy way with it in the world,---and thou doft it like a man of honour,---'tis enough for us. As foon as my uncle Toby had laid a foundation, and taught him to infcribe a regular polygon in a circle, he fent him to a public fchool, where, excepting Whitfontide |