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vered of the power of God in making me close with the promise, than in discovering my duty, and inclining me to believe. There was much of this faith wrought by my own power, which made Satan brangle it upon this very head. 2dly, I secretly rested, after I believed, in the act of faith rather than in the object of faith, and drew comfort from this more than from the object-Christ holden out in the gospel. 3dly, I was more convinced that believing was my duty, than I understood what believing was; the equity of believing appeared, but not the rationality. I was not so convinced of the grounds of believing; and therefore was I confused, and utterly at a loss what to believe. For generals could not be a ground of particular application, without which I could not have peace. Nor had I peace in the bare hopes that Christ would save me, because faith and hope appear to me to be different. 4thly, And the ground of all this was, though the gospel revealed to me my duty formally and clearly, yet not the object of faith, the covenant of grace giving Christ himself; of whom, though I had some knowledge as of one able to save me, and who only was my upmaking, yet at this time I knew him not so distinctly in his offices and offers, nor in the grounds he gave of believing, till afterwards; nor was I so acquaint with the nature of absolute promises, and their reach, till afterwards. 5thly, I looked too much for something from Christ's life and resurrection, and did not so expressly and distinctly (though I did really) close for himself. 6thly, I closed for spiritual benefits, but not for temporal benefits. 7thly, I limited the Holy One of Israel; for I made but use of faith for a time, until it should convey sense of life and consolation. And this I expected immediately, or shortly after I had believed; and that, when that sense came, there would never be a change again, and no use made of faith, but fair days from henceforth. I did not lay my account to wait all the days of my appointed time; and, therefore, not laying my account with trouble and long desertions, the storm that thereafter blew overthrew me.

§ 11. The end of which dispensation, I think, was to acquaint me more distinctly and clearly with the method of effectual calling,

which formerly I had not so clearly known. 2dly, To learn me to. live the life of faith, and to wean me from sense. 3dly, To acquaint me with his love, and to manifest and give proof thereof to me. Which appeared clearly in this work; for when I was not dreaming of faith, when all that ever I heard could not clear me what it was, nor suspected such a duty, and when multiplied objections were in my way, Oh how clearly did he loose them! How strongly, how lovingly, how incessantly, how patiently, how condescendingly to my weakness, how earnestly and strongly did he draw! And, lest I should doubt that he was well pleased with what I had done, he sealed it with the budding forth of sanctification, with joy and assurance. But in nothing am I more assured that this was true faith, than by the Lord's constant preserving it, notwithstanding of all tentations: "When I was young he loved me, and led me by the arms, teaching me to go," Hos. xi. 1, 3, and in this he appeared the main doer. 4thly, His end was to bring me to rest, which is by faith: not to a rest from labour or work, nor a rest from tentations, afflictions, and sorrows, and wanderings now and then, but to a rest of security and settlement from fears. For, till the soul close with Christ, it never hath any ground of security or peace; then hath a man strength to perform duties, a balm against the sting of sin in the conscience, an undoubted evident and security for heaven, an undoubted strength to flee to in all extremities; it is now not like a wave in the sea, tossed to and fro, but it is fixed and centred.

§ 12. From this I observe, 1st, That, ere ever a soul can believe, he must be called of God; for else no man would, could, or should come, Rom. viii. 30; 1 Cor. i. 2; Jer. iii. 22. 2dly, That the immediate end of effectual calling is to receive Christ by faith, or to believe in, and rest on him for all things, John vi. 28, 29; Mat. xxii. 3; Isa. lv. 1. For though the saints be said to be called to heaven, to peace, to be holy; yet is not this the immediate end of effectual calling, but, as I said, to receive Jesus Christ, and all things, freely offered in the gospel. 3dly, As it is God that calls, so it is God that maketh to answer this call; and the creature is but merely passive, 1 Pet. ii. 9. 4thly, This call is inward as well

as outward, borne in upon our spirit; God takes a dealing with the heart, Hos. ii. 14. For the outward call will never do it: "I will call her to the wilderness, and speak to her heart," Jer. xxxi. 33; 2 Cor. iii. 3. 5thly, This call is a glorious call, and stamped with majesty and authority. As it is the Lord that calls, so doth he stamp his own name on it, so that the soul knows it is God that is dealing with him. And so, "where the word of a king is, there is power;" and "who may say unto him, What doest thou?" 6thly, This call is in the word, or by it, Rom. x. 16, 17, not by dumb enthusiasms, superstitions, or a mere providence. It was by the word I was convinced it was duty to believe, the word gave me motives, and loosed my objections-all my warrants were from the word. 7thly, Faith is neither to love Christ, or to be content to take him; for that is wrought already: (to love a person, and to be content to marry him, is not marriage; it is but a disposition to marriage ;) nor yet to believe that he is able to save, or to hope; but it is to believe on Christ that he is yours, and will bestow himself and all things on you; and, when thus you believe, you have it or, it is a cordial assent, and particular application of the promises, giving Christ and all his benefits. Give but a particular

and cordial assent to the gospel, and that is believing; and he never heard the gospel to whom it spoke not this. I have largely proven this elsewhere, I now give my experience, 1 Tim. i. 15. 8thly, The grounds of faith are the command of God, the offer of the gospel, but especially the gospel declaration and promise, which at that time was not revealed to me, Mat. xi. 28; 2 Cor. v. 19, 20, 21. The New Testament ministers beseech all to be reconciled, and upon this ground, because he hath "made him sin for us that knew no sin;" this is the rational ground of believing. The command is the moral ground of believing, God giving Christ freely, and making him sin, and our covenant, and forgiving in his name; and the gospel declaring this. Hence it is more than a naked offer. 9thly, Although it be the duty of all to believe, and though preparatory qualifications give no right to believe or to Christ; yet is Christ never revealed effectually to save a soul, until

in some measure that soul be made to find its own emptiness, and want of self-righteousness. It is the blind and lame that are compelled to come, Luke xiv. 21, 23; Mat. xi. 28; John ix. 39; Prov. ix. 4, 5. 10thly, True humiliation doth not consist in legal terrors; and one, sufficiently humbled for sin, may yet be under apprehensions and sense of deadness, Isa. lxiii. 17; Psal. lxxx. 18; nor yet in the continuance of terrors, else the damned in hell should be most humbled. Only it is rather in a conviction of the want of all things, raising a dissatisfaction with the present condition, and a despair of self, and a justifying of God in all matters. Yea, the truest preparations for Christ are a sense and conviction of vileness, and guiltiness, deadness, hardness, and blindness, and a weariedness with the world and duties, and the ill heart. 11thly, The heart truly humbled must be touched with original corruption and heartplagues, and a state of distance and enmity, John xvi. 9. 12thly, Though all be humbled, all are not alike humbled; so, though all believers be drawn to Christ, and united to him, yet are not all drawn in the same manner to Christ. To some heaven, as it were, is opened, the Lord revealing the glory of Jesus to them, so as they, without a hinck,1 leave all, and come flying to him, Mat. xiii. 44, so as the soul is so overpowered, that it cannot but cling to the Lord Jesus. There are others that are under deep horrors, and brought down to hell, and distracted with terrors; and Christ is lovely as one that saves from wrath and hell. Necessity makes them flee to the city of refuge, Acts ii. 37; Heb. vi. 18; Psal. exliii. 9. Some, under the sense of a dead, blind, empty heart, flee to him for life and eye-salve more expressly, Prov. ix. 4; Jer. xxxi. 18, 19; Hosea xiv. 1; Rev. iii. 18. Some find they cannot come; they desire the Lord to do it, Lam. v. 21; Jer. xxxi. 18. Some, by the sense of a command, do desperately venture, and their faith is an act of wilfulness, Job xiii. 15. Some come to Christ, and they hang (having his promise, "That whosoever comes he will in nowise cast off") by expectations, hope, and desire, until a greater window be opened in heaven; and then they clearly receive Christ, when the Lord Jesus is given, so as the everlasting 1 Objection, resistance.

doors are opened, Psal. xxiv. 7, 9. Not that these doors were not opened before, but because the frame of heart was not so discovered; for a desire after Christ, and a believing what the gospel saith, and a hope upon this, is a real, though not a sensible, receiving of Christ; only time doth ordinarily manifest the reality of this. Some close with Christ by way of a marriage-consent and contract, Christ overcoming the heart by love, Hosea ii. 19, 20; Eph. v. 25; Jer. xxxi. 33; and 1. 5. Some come to Christ by way of looking to him; in some their faith is but a hope, or doth resemble it. 13thly, Love is the key that opens the heart, Rom. x. 10, "With the heart man believes to salvation," Hosea ii. 19, 20, which love will kyth in a mourning for want of him, and a desire after him, and a rejoicing in any thing that appears like him, and a love unto his people. And, as there is affection in his people to him, so is there love kythed in the Lord's courting of his people. The command itself, "Turn," hath love engraven on it, the Lord's so earnest seeking of it, his large offers to gain this. 14thly, The soul, in believing, closes with the person of Christ, (he is the principal object, though not the immediate object, of faith,) and closes with him only, and for ever; the soul desires this, and mourns that it is not so: "Take away all sins," Hosea xiv. 3; Jer. 1. 5; Psal. xc. 1. For, to come to Christ for his benefits only is not a personal love; to come to Christ, but not to him only, is an adulterous marriage; to come to him for some time, and not for ever, is but to give Christ a visit, not to marry him. 15thly, The whole life of a man is a continued conversion to God, in which he is perpetually humbled under sense of sin, and draws nearer and nearer to God, with more fervent faith and love, and daily walks closer and closer with the Lord, endeavouring at perfection, Mat. xviii. 3; Luke xxii. 32; Prov. xxiii. 26; Cant. iv. 8; Psal. lxiv. 7. And God doth as it were act over and over again his work in the heart, forming his people more exactly than before. And therefore no wonder they meet with something like a second, yea, and a third and fourth conversion; especially where there are backslidings. 16thly, True faith is lively and fruitful; for it strengthens, settles,

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