Nimb. He is at Mrs. Elder's. Love How dare the old Hag entertain him, when fhe knows my averfion to him Nimble, if any of her cattle or poultry fhou'd eater upon my ground, take a ftick and break their legs. Nimb That I will, Sir.-The Captain will never trouble your daughter again. Lovef How do you mean? Nimb. Ha, ha, ha, I can't help laughing, you'll laugh too. I went and bought a good, ftrong, wholesome dofe of poifon and gave it to Mis. Elder, to mix with his drink. Love The devil! you did n't. Nimb. Yes, I did,- -it will foon fettle his hafh,-it will make him kick up his heels, I'll warrant him. Love Ob, confound you! you'll be hang'd. Nimb. I told the ftory in the village, and when I faw the people fo diverted, I'll tell you what I did for your credit. Love What did you do? Nimb. I told them that contrivance was all your's. Lovef Oh! you curfed rogue,-run and prevent the murder!. Nimb. I wish I had let him run off with your daughter. Love I wish I had!-Oh Lord!-Oh Lord!this will make a most damnable'ftory! Exit raving. Nimb Ha, ha, ha, I have him,—I have him —Poor old credulous fool! he'll confent to get his daughter's neck into one noofe, to keep his own out of another. A C T II. SCENE I. CAPTAIN and NIMBLE and others, fitting round a table, with a bowl of punch, &c. SONG. COME tofs off your glass, now each jovial foul, Since ev'ry glass is prim'd and charg'd, let's fire (They Why now that's right, we'll drink and fight, like fons of the fword. That our names to pofterity may live upon record. 3 The threats of proud Frenchmen, with fcorn we defy, 4 That our Commerce may profper in every degree, Prefent, &c. Capt. Nimble. I think we have fixt poor Flourish ・・ now, what am I to do next? Nimb. You muft allow me to kill you. Capt. To kill me!` Nimb. Yes, by report, a Newspaper death;-a death that may be contradicted whenever we please. Capt. But what will fuch a report avail ? Nim. Much -The old Gentleman will not only look upon himself as an accomplice, but the very principal in your murder and when he finds his mistake will give you his daughter. Capt. But if he shou'd not? Nimb. If he fhou'd not, you shall be admitted into the house, as my fecond Coufid, ju return'd from the Continent, that will afford you an opportunity of fpeak ing to Mifa Sophy Capt. But when he finds I'm alive Nimb. He'll be apprehenfive you'll come and feal a way his daughter, and I'll perfuade him to appoint you and me to watch all night;-and what muft he expect that appoints the fox to watch his hen. ? Capt. That he fhould run away with her. Capt. But there's a certain Gentleman, called Mr. Thomas; you fay, he's no friend of mine. Nimb. He's not Thomas now. Capt No! Nimb. No, he's not himself.—I've made him drunk with whisky. Capt. Why, Nimble-I'm but a cypher in this court. ship. Nimb. I hope you're not angry at that. What wou'd your Kings and Emperors do, if they had not people to plan and execute for them, while they fit at home at their eafe? Capt. Well, well, my good fellow, you shan't ferve me for nothing.. Nimb. But, I fay, I fhall. I have as good a right to make a prefent of my fervice to you, as you have to make a prefent of yours to your King and Country. Capt. But the fatisfaction I derive Nimb From your fervice, cannot be greater than what I reap from mine!-You have oblig'd me long ago :always paid the intereft with my gratitude.-Now, I'm happy, I can clear a little of the principal with my fervices. Nimb. Well, Nimble -This kindnefe,and fo unfolicited too Nimb. Unfolicited, Sir. When a generous action demands my fervice, I can be a Volunteer as well as you.. But will you retire, and disguise yourself as a wounded foldier. I muft fpeak to Mra. Elder, about a little pig, which must bear hia part in this adventure. Capt. I don't comprehend you Nimb. I'll explain it all by and bye.-People may fay, I'm not a man of principle;-but never mind my principal, as long as I can promote your intereft.-Retire, here fhe is [Capt. retires O. P. Mrs. Elder enters P.S. Mrs. Eld. Mr. Nimble, you're a great ftranger. Nimb. Truly, Mrs. Elder, we're very bufy at our houfe. -I believe one of your family has met with a bit of an accident at our house to day. Mrs. Eld. Oh ay! my poor little black pig had his leg broke;-know you any thing of it? Nimb Yes, I do-He us'd to lurk about our houfe, and my Mafter order'd me to take a ftick and break his leg. Mrs. Eld. Oh, the cruel man!-there never was a fweeter creature fet nofe to gutter, Nimb. My Matter has fent you a Guinea, begging. that you may kill the poor creature immediately; but you must not mention his having any hand in it. Mrs. Eld. Well, you may tell his Worship, that we'll kill him, poor thing.I had him from a great favourite. But we must all die, from the King on the throne, to the pig on the dunghill.-Mr. Nimble, give us a song. Nimb. Really I've got a great cold. Mrs. Eld. Then I'll give you one. (Begins a line of a Song-Bell rings) Coming, coming. Mr. Nimble, your fervant.. I fhall be glad to fee you, when you have an odd penny to spend. [Exit. Nimb. And, I fuppofe, you'll be forry to fee me, if I have not an even penny to spend. (Enter Capt. difguis'd.) Now, Sir, we'll away to old Loveftory.--I'll tell him, Mrs. Elder has kill'd you. Capt. I underftand.-I overheard it all. Nimb. Oh! it will do -The miftake of the black pig will enable us to carry on our defign, but you must wear a black patch. Capt. Never fear but I'll play my part, love and war juftify any fratagem. SCENE. Before LOVESTORY's Door. Love. I burn, 1 fry with impatience, yet the rogue won't come with a drop of comfort.-I'll fend Thomas. Thomas, where are you? Enter THOMAS, drunk. Thom. Here I am. Love You've been at the whifky again. Thom. I can't fay but what I have.-The Latins call'd it Aquivita;-the Caledonians, Ufquebay ;-which is, by interpretation, the Water of Life:-Therefore, it wou'd be the death of me to want it. Loves. Do you think you can run to Mrs. Elder's. Thom. Yes, I'll either run, hop-ftep or jump all the way. (Going.) Love Where are you going;-what will you fay when you're there? Thom. I'm not there yet. Livef. Do you mind what I fay-to you. Thom. Let me alone for that, a nod's as good as a wink to a dead horse. Lovef. A blind horse you mean, you beaft! Thom. And is not a dead horse always a blind horfe? Lovef. Go to your bed, Sir. Thom. No, I won't, I went to my bed laft,-let my bed come to me now, turn about is fair play. Good day to you. Loves. Oh! here comes the other !— [Stammers off. Enter NIMBLE and CAPTAIN, like a Soldier, with a patch upon his eye. Lovef. Who is that, Nimble? Nimb. A Coufin of mine, who was wounded on the Continent? Love, Egad, he can tell us fome excellent ftories. Nimb. Yes, he can pretend to be dumb. [Afide to Capt. (Capt. makes a noife like a dumb man.) Love. What the devil is that? Nimb. A little impediment in his fpeech, owing to their having cut out his tongue. Loves. Oh !-then he can tell us nothing. (Captain makes figns for writing). What's that? Nimb. He fays, he wants pen, ink and paper. Lovef. Does he?-Egad he has a ftrange way of faying it. Yonder's Jenny.-Come here Mrs Volunteer, and fhew this fellow into the houfe; and give him pen, ink and paper. And do you hear, Sir, be fure you write me fome curious ftories of the war. (Captain bows and makes a noife.) Jenny Poor fellow!-has he loft bis tongue? Lovef Ay has he, but you may lend him a piece of yours, you can very well fpare it. Jenny. Come away, poor Dummie. [Exit with Capt. Nimb. He'll trouble your daughter no more. Love What!—is he dead? Nimb. As dead as Roberfpiere. Love. You remember I never advised you Nimb. Did you not!I think I have it in black and white, under your own hand, that. you employ'd me. Lovef. Oh! you curfed rogue! I'll be hang'd and my Speech will be fold for a ha'penny !-Oh dear! oh dear! |