a very tall Man ---- a very good Whore. ---- Why is not this a lamentable thing, Grandfire, that we should be thus afflicted with these strange Flies, these Fashion-mongers, these pardon-me's, who stand so much on the new Form, that they cannot fit at ease on the old Bench. O their Bones, their Bones. Enter Romeo. Ben. Here comes Romeo, here comes Romeo. Mer. Without his Roe, like a dried Herring. O Flesh, Flesh, how art thou fishified? Now is he for the Numbers that Petrarch flowed in: Laura to his Lady was a Kitchenwench; marry she had a better love to berime her: Dido a Dowdy, Cleopatra a Gipsie, Helen and Hero Hildings and Harlots: Thisby a gray Eye or fo, but not to the purpose. Signior Romeo, Bonjour, there's a French Salutation to your French flop; you gave us the Counterfeit fairly last Night. Rom. Good morrow to you both, what Counterfeit did I give you? Mer. The flip Sir, the flip: can you not conceive ? Rom. Pardon Mercutio, my Business was great, and in such a Case as mine, a Man may strain Curtfie. Mer. That's as much as to say, such a case as yours con strains a Man to bow in the Hams. Rom. Meaning to Curtsie. Mer. Thou hast most kindly hit it. Rom. A most courteous Exposition. Mer. Nay, I am the very Pink of Courtefie. Rom. Pink for Flower. Mer. Right. Rom. Why then is my Pump well flower'd. Mer. Sure Wit - follow me this Jest, now, till thou haft worn out thy Pump, that when the fingle sole of it is worn, the Jest may remain after the wearing, fole-fingular. Rom. O fingle-fol'd Jeft. Solely fingular, for the singleness. Mer. Come between us good Benvolio, my Wit faints. Rom. Swits and Spurs, Swits and Spurs, or I'll cry a Match. Mer. Nay, if our Wits run the Wild-goofe Chase, I am done: For thou haft more of the Wild-goose in one of thy thy Wits, than I am sure I have in my whole five. Was I with you there for the Goofe ? Rom. Thou wast never with me for any thing, when thou wast not there for the Goofe ? Mer. I will bite thee by the Ear for that Jest. Rom. Nay, good Goose bite not. Mer. Thy Wit is a very bitter Sweeting, It is a most sharp Sawce. Rom. And is it not well-serv'd in to a sweet Goose? Mer. O here's a Wit of Cheverel, that stretches from an Inch narrow, to an Ell broad. Rom. I stretch it out for that word broad, which added to the Goose, proves thee far and wide, a broad Goose. Mer. Why is not this better now, than groaning for Love? Now art thou sociable; now art thou Romeo; now art thou what thou art, by Art, as well as by Nature; for this driveling Love is like a great Natural, that runs lolling up and down to hide his Bauble in a Hole. Ben. Stop there, stop there. Mer. Thou defirest me to stop in my Tale against the Hair. Ben. Thou wouldst else have made thy Tale large. Mer. O thou art deceiv'd, I would have made it short, for I was come to the whole depth of my Tale, and meant indeed to occupy the Argument no longer. Enter Nurse and her Man. Rom. Here's goodly gear : A fayle, a sayle. Mer. Two, two, a Shirt and a Smock. Nur. Peter. Pet. Anon. Nur. My Fan, Peter. Mer. Good Peter, to hide her Face; For her Fan's the fairer Face. Nur. God ye good morrow, Gentlemen. Mer. God ye good-den fair Gentlewoman. Nur. Is is good-den? Mer. 'Tis no less, I tell you; for the bawdy Hand of the Dyal is now upon the prick of Noon. Nur. Out upon you; what a Man are you? Rom. One, Gentlewoman, That God hath made, himself to mar. D Nar Nur. By my troth it is sad: for himself to mar, quotha ? Gentlemen, can any of you tell me where I may find the young Romeo? Rom. I can tell you: But young Romeo will be older when you have found him, than he was when you fought him: I am the youngest of that Name, for fault of a worse. Nur. You say well. Mer. Yea, is the worst well? Very well took, I'faith, wifely, wifely. I defire fome Confidence with you. Ben. She will invite him to fome Supper. Rom. What haft thou found ? Mer. No Hare, Sir, unless a Hare Sir, in a Lenten Pye; that is fomething Stale and Hoar e'er it be spent. An old Hare hoar, and an old Hare hoar, is very good Meat in Lent. But a Hare that is hoar, is too much for a Score, when it hoars e'er it be spent. Romeo, will you come to your Father's? We'll to Dinner thither. Rom. I will follow you. [Ex. Mercutio, Benvolio. Farewel Lady, Lady, Lady. Nur. I pray you, Sir, what faucy Merchant was this that was so full of his Roguery ? Rom. A Gentleman, Nurse, that loves to hear himself talk, and will speak more in a Minute, than he will stand to in a Month. Nur. And a speak any thing against me, I'll take him down, and a were luftier than he is, and twenty such Jacks: And if I cannot, I'll find those that shall. Scurvy Knave, I am none of his Flirt-gils; I am none of his Skains-mates. And thou must stand by too, and fuffer every Knave to use me at his pleasure. [To her Man. Pet. I faw no Man use you at his Pleasure: If I had, my Weapon should quickly have been out, I warant you. I dare draw as foon as another Man, if I fee occafion in a good Quarrel, and the Law on my fide. Nur. Nur. Now afore God, I am so vext, that every part a bout me quivers Scurvy Knave! Pray you, Sir, a Word : And as I told you, my young Lady bid me enquire you out; what the bid me say, I will keep to my felf: But first let me tell ye, if ye should lead her in a Fool's Paradise, as they say, it were a very gross kind of Behaviour, as they say, for the Gentlewoman is young; and therefore if you should deal double with her, truly it were an ill thing to be offered to any Gentlewoman, and very weak dealing. Rom. Commend me to thy Lady and Mistress, I protest unto thee Nur. Good Heart, and I'faith I will tell her as much: Lord, Lord, the will be a joyful Woman. Rom. What wilt thou tell her, Nurse ? Thou dost not mark me? ( Nur. I will tell her, Sir, that you do protest; which, as I take it, is a Gentleman-like offer. Rom. Bid her devise some means to come to Shrift, this af- And there she shall at Friar Lawrence's Cell, Rom. Go to, I say you shall. Nur. This Afternoon, Sir? Well, she shall be there. Within this Hour my Man shall be with thee, Nur. Now God in Heaven bless thee: Hark you, Sira Two may keep Counsel, putting one away? Rom. I warrant thee my Man's as true as Steel. Nur. Well, Sir, my Mistress is the sweetest Lady; Lord, Lord, when 'twas a little prating thing-O, there is a Noble Man in Town, one Paris, that would fain lay Knife aboard; but she, good Soul, had as live fee a Toad, a very Toad, as fee him: I anger her fometimes, and tell her that Paris is the properer Man; but I'll warrant you, when I fay so, she looks as pale as any Clout in the versal World. Deth not Rosemary and Romeo begin both with a Letter? Rom. Ay Nurle, what of that? Both with an R. Nur. Ah mocker! that's the Dog's name. R. is for the no, I know it begins with no other Letter, and the hath the prettiest sententious of it, of you and Rosemary, that it would do you good to hear it. Rom. Commend me to thy Lady. [Exit Romeo. Pet. Anon. Nur. Before, and apace. Enter Juliet. [Excunt. SCENE VI. Capulet's House. Jul. The Clock stroke Nine, when I did fend the Nurse: In half an Hour she promised to return. My Words would bandy her to my sweet Love, But old Folks, many feign as they were Dead, Unwieldy, flow, heavy and pale as Lead. Enter Nurse. O God, the comes. O honey Nurse, what News? Nur. Peter, stay at the Gate. Jul. Now good sweet Nurse O Lord, why look'st thou sad ? Tho' News be sad, yet tell them merrily, By playing it to me with so sower a Face. Nur. |