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· Monetta Vanilla Jillet,
indeed, a respectable personage Philomela Gill,
enongh, but the name does not seem Theodosia Stirrup,
to have affected modern ears and Statira Penny,
fancies very agreeably, for I do not Sackarissa Stokes,
recollect a single personage of any Laodamea Eccles,
consequence, in European annals, Sophia Louisa Tubman. by the name of Job. No king, that
I recollect, no general, no poet, no I have rambled away into a dis- philosopher has ever honoured this sertation upon the names of men name with his acceptance. In such and women, when I sat down merely general disrepute is this mouth-fillto ruminate upon a name proper to ing monosyllable held, that nobody confer upon my own lucubrations. ever dreams of conferring it even I have formed the resolution to upon negroes, horses, dogs, or parwrite a series of essays. As to rots, a fastidousness for which I their subject, I purpose to rely upon never could account. the suggestions of the moment; but I have often thought myself una name must be immediately disco fortunate in being dubbed with this vered and adopted.
abrupt and surly appellation ; and Though a name, on such occa. even at this day, which is the forsions, is matter of so little real mo- tieth anniversary of my birth, I am ment, we are generally extremely never called upon to write it or propuzzled to make a choice. Miscel. nounce it without being out of counlaneous essays cannot be reduced to tenance. I know my scruples are any comprehensive title, and there silly, and that names borrow their is generally a humourous opposition significance entirely from the chabetween the title and the theme of racter of those that wear them, and the lucubration. The Lounger, the that had I been honoured with the Tatler, the Rambler, the Idler are most superb appellation that a conall names which have not the least gress of grammarians could invent, I relation to the tenor of the works should be valued and esteemed exto which they are attached. They actly according to my personal meseem to have been adopted by rits. But though Alexander, Maxichance, or through wantonness. milian, or Horatio will not rescue
After much reflection, I have the bearer from any contempt or finally determined to affix to these detestation to which his character essays my own name. I might, in- and conduct may justly entitle him, deed, have hit upon imaginary it is to be feared that a strong names, more musical and pleasing prejudice connected with a name, to the ear, and have bestowed it will operate a little to the disadon myself without any danger of vantage of the wearer. It is always detection. When I first took up desirable to have the first impresthe pen, I let it run on, under the sion which we make upon others a conviction that it might light upon favourable one, and the world, as some grand and beautiful assem- every body knows, is governed by blage of sounds; but, by the time I names. reached the last name in the above I once asked my mother why she romantic catalogue, I settled down gave me this name. She told me it into the sober and reasonable resolu. was entirely my father's doings.... tion to dispense with all affectation The book of Job was his favourite and fiction, and employ the identi- study, and his grand consolation cal name which I received in bap- in all the evils and crosses of human tism.
life, and the poor man had his share. Job Strutt is not the most musical The old gentleman, indeed, was and sounding of human names. It something of a poet; but the only borrows not much dignity from as sample now extant of his poetical sociation. Job the patient was, propensities was a version of the book of Job. He was determined family, from my great-grandfather to perpetuate his veneration for the downward, have been hereditary patriarch, by giving the name to coblers. his first, and, as it turned out, his Upon second thoughts..........but I only son, and all my mother's gain- have drawn out this essay to a sufsaying availed nothing. She was ficient length, and shall, therefore, strenuous for Theodore, which, be- for the present, end here. sides its beauty as a mere succession of sounds, and its merits, considering its significance as a com for the Literary Magazine. pound word, was the name of her father and brother. The poor wo.
NEW YEAR'S DAY. man had set her heart upon Theodore, and to be thwarted in this
A Fragment. darling hope was a misfortune she could hardly endure. When the ........WHEN we reach a new year's death of my father put an end to day, we reach an eminence in the the hopes she had never ceased to journey of life, where we are natus cherish, that she should have an rally prompted to pause, from opportunity of conferring her dar. which we have an opportunity of ling name on a second son, a scheme seeing a large portion of the road which my father acquiesced in, her we have passed, and are powerfully grief was deepened by despair. It induced to cast our view forward in is hard to penetrate the motives of search of futurity. Each one who people, even in the most important has attained this height looks back actions of their lives; but, for my and looks forward on a scene, and part, I have very little doubt that to with emotions, peculiar to himself. rid herself of the odious name of What are my emotions? what is Strutt, and procure an opportunity the scene which I have passed, and of giving to her offspring the name what the prospects which futurity of Theodore, were the principal discloses to my anxious view ? motives which reconciled her to a Thirty-four years have now gone second marriage. Poor woman! over me. They still find me on the Heaven cursed her, as is usual, surface of the earth alive, erect, with the grant of her own wishes, What has become of all those who for her Theodore is unluckily dis- came into existence at the same tinguished by a hump on his back, time! How many have come to an and by a temper as crooked and untimely end ! How many have perverse as his body.
been cut off ere the prime of life! As to my second name, Strutt, How many of my own favourite how the deuce my family came to be companions, my chosen friends, now saddled with it I cannot imagine. sleep in an early grave! And how Al names were, probably, in their chequered have been their destinies! original, nicknames, that is, were My earliest and infantile play descriptive, or designed to be des- mate, with whom I used to play criptive, of some quality or circum- horses, and con the ABC together, stance about them. My ancestor, I though born to elevated prospects, suppose, was of a haughty and as- endowed with good capacity, and piring character and port: but they improved by a learned education, must have owed the loftiness of their trod the paths of idleness and dissideportment to some innate elevation pation, which terminated in the loss of mind, for, so far as I have been of reason. For years he resided in able to trace their history, there was the hospital for lunatics, and it is not nothing, in their outward circum- many months since his body, long stances, of which they could rea. infected with the decay which had sonably boast. I am loath to say it, previously devoured his mind, was but it is in vain to deny, that my consigned to a nameless grave.
The period of infancy past, it was plied the place of merit, and have my lot to form the most intimate given me every good that fancy alliance with a youth, whose moral could image, in spite of my own habits were as blameless as his stu- nefarious indolence, or perverse acdious propensities were laudable. tivity. The neglect of a nurse, in child. Always has my heart sighed for hood, made him an incurable cripple, a conjugal companion. What has and contributed, no doubt, to stimu- ever been my favourite, though late his zeal in those pursuits which hopeless, dream ? That a woman, promised him, in usefulness and in whom personal, intellectual, and glory, a compensation for his bodily moral excellence should be enshrininfirmities.
ed, should give herself to me. That After much self-debate he devot. I should ever light on such a being; ed himself to the medical science; that such a being, when found, but, alas! his intense application should ever deign to bind herself to soon overturned his already totter. me; that my own condition should ing fabric, and he died before his ever be such, when such a consent. twentieth year. Many times, dur. ing being were found, as to allow ing our intercourse, had he occasion us the choice of the inseparable life, to sit beside my sick bed, and often were always regarded as impossidid he predict that ere the next sun ble. They were phantoms of a gay, should rise, I should draw my last ideal world, laboriously created, and breath. Yet it was my lot to follow illumining my fancy for a moment, him to his grave.
merely to leave, when they withSince that period many have been drew, a more dreary and palpable the friendships which accident has obscurity behind them. led me to form. As often as my In this has a benign Providence choice was made, did death step to been particularly propitious. Do I ravish my beloved companion from not possess all that I wished? All my arms. It is not many months that surpassed my hopes, and far since I witnessed the departure of outstripped my deserts, has showthe third among them
ered itself down upon me; and this Why, in thus dealing out destruc- anniversary has risen with more tion, has a mysterious destiny spar- felicities to my view, than any fored me? My merits have been un- mer one: felicities which want nospeakably inferior to those whose thing but stability and long continu. loss I lament. The spacious circle ance to make full the cup of my of the world, and the small circle of desires....... relations and friends, would have Jan. 1, 1805. had much less reason to deplore my death than theirs. They were the pride, the boast, the hope of all connected with them. I have hi For the Literary Magazine. therto lived, and, such is the omnipotence of evil habits, shall hereaf
HUMPHREYS' WORKS. ter live without glory to myself, or felicity or benefit to those around THE Miscellaneous Works of me.
David Humphreys, Esq., Minister I have been most unfortunate in Extraordinary to the Court of Mapossessing a character, and imbib- drid, have been lately republished ing habits, which merit nothing but in New York. Most of the poetical poverty and ignominy; which have pieces contained in this volume were invariably and incessantly commit. written and published either during ted to hazard life, health, fame, and the American war, or shortly after competence. Most fortunate have its termination. Their merit, there. I been in possessing friends, and fore, has long ago been settled by meeting circumstances, which sup- the public opijion.
The author's modesty appears to For the Literary Magazine. have inspired him with a notion that his name was already not at all, or CHESNUTS AND RAIL TIMBER. but little known to his readers. He has therefore thought proper to col. TO prevent chesnuts being des.
lect as many recommendatory scraps troyed by the moles, when planted, , and notices as possible, and to put let them be planted with the burs
them in front of his book, that they on; this has been successfully pracmay make a favourable impression. tised in New Jersey, on a large To appear in public with all the scale, by a Frenchman. At the age badges and insignia of our rank, and of three years, he cuts them down all the tokens of the public regard, (or heads them down, agreeably to conspicuously displayed and hung Forsyth), and when they have timabout us, may, at first, appear to ber enough for a few rails, they may argue a little vanity, but, rightly be again cut down. considered, it may more properly In those parts of the United States be deemed an indication of a self. in which the beech and maple predisclaiming disposition.
dominate, rail timber is well supTo say truth, colonel Humphreys plied from the white ash, wild cheris no inconsiderable poet, and had ry, birch, and hemlock. This last he more rarely introduced himself will not split from the centre, but into the poetical canvas, he would must be sliced from the outside, not, therefore, have attracted less which makes the splitting easy. notice. The reader is, indeed, fre. This is much practised in New quently amused by the ingenuity dis- England, and the rails are very duplayed by the author in hitching in rable. his own merits and exploits, where they would naturally be least expected.
For the Literary Magazine. His principal poems are of a kind not easily described. They are na
FRENCH REVOLUTIONARY tional or political descants, in which
EPOCHAS. the nation is made the subject of encomium, and its future glories THE French revolution having pourtrayed with a very liberal fancy. now apparently drawn to a close, it A poem on American industry has may not be uninteresting to take a been written lately, and the views it short view of the revolutionary contains are equally recommended epochas. by their truth, and by the ornaments May 5, 1789. States general met with which a classical fancy has in- at Versailles. vested them.
October 6. The king brought from Many passages might be selected Versailles to Paris. from each of these poems, in which June 21, 1791. The king fied from a high degree of poetical excellence Paris....brought back from Varennes. is to be found ; but their merit is too September 14. The king accepts generally acknowledged, and their the constitution. tenor too familiarly known, to jus. June 20, 1792. The king assaulted tify quotation or comment. There in the Thuilleries. are also, candour compels us to ac- August 10. The Thuilleries taken, knowledge, many passages which and the king takes refuge in the lerequire the pruning or the lopping gislative assembly. hand.
September 22. Convention met.... The principal prose performance royalty abolished.....republican year in this volume is the life of Putnam : commenced. not a very profound, but a truly en January 21, 1793. The king betertaining aud agreeable piece of headed. biography.
May 31, 1793. Brissotine party
arrested....condemned 9th, and guil- seizes the reins of government (18th lotined the 10th Brumaire.
Brumaire) and establishes the conJuly 27, 1794. Roberspierrian sulat. party guillotined.... 10th Thermidor, December 15, 1799. Bonaparte
named first consul. September 22, 1795. New consti. June 14, 1800. Battle of Matution put in force of five directors. rengo.
September 4, 1797. Two direc. August 4, 1802. Bonaparte made tors and fifty-two deputies arrested first consul for life, with power to for a conspiracy to introduce royal name a successor. ty.... 18th Fructidor, 5th year.
- 1804. Bonaparte November 9, 1799. Bonaparte made emperor.
For the Literary Magazine.
Be this thy task, a task sublimely hand,
SONNET, BY HAYLEY.
" The remark you make on Pope's too
SELECTED. limited prospect of his own posthumous renown had occurred to me, a few years ago, and gave rise to a son
TO THE NEW MOON. net (reserved with many others in manuscript), which I will transcribe OH stay awhile thy silver horn, as a proof of our sympathy on this That hastens now so fast away, subject.”
Adown the western pathway borne,
Closing the rear of parting day! “ READ in one island! in one age for.
Sweet queen of heaven! thou canst Such was the poet's view of bound not find ed fame,
In all thy daily circled course, When pensive Pope explained his One who more feels within his mind serious aim;
Thy soft persuasive beauty's force. But as the palace rises from the lot, See Fortune aggrandize his narrow spot! Thou goest o'er the lonely deep See a new Britain in the west pro. To waste thy splendour on the tide, claim
Where only sea-born monsters sweep, Through social regions his re-echoed Unheeding of thy beamy pride;
name, While boundless glory is his brilliant Or on some woody mountain's head, lot!
Canadian wilds shall drink thy ray ;
Where savage tygers prowling tread, Earth thus expanding to befriend the And savage men more fierce than
bard; Poetic genius! with a grander scope Spread thy bold wing; and with thy Or on the long Atlantic shore, eagle-Hope,
The realm of trade thy view shall Bask under heaven's illuminated cope. greet,