1 Gent. How now? Which of your hips has the most profound sciatica? Bawd. Well, well; there's one yonder arrested," and carried to prison, was worth five thousand of you all. 1 Gent. Who's that, I pray thee? Bawd. Marry, sir, that's Claudio, signior Claudio. 1 Gent. Claudio to prison! 'tis not so. Bawd. Nay, but I know, 'tis so: I saw him arrested; saw him carried away; and, which is more, within these three days his head's to be chopped off. have it so: art thou sure of this? Lucio. But, after all this fooling, I would not Bawd. I am too sure of it: and it is for getting madam Julietta with child. Lucio. Believe me, this may be: he promised Lucio. Thou concludest like the sanctimonious to meet me two hours since; and he was ever prepirate, that went to sea with the ten command-cise in promise-keeping. ments, but scraped one out of the table. 2 Gent. Thou shalt not steal? Lucio. Ay, that he razed. 1 Gent. Why, 'twas a commandment to command the captain and all the rest from their functions; they put forth to steal: there's not a soldier of us all, that, in the thanksgiving before meat, doth relish the petition well that prays for peace. 2 Gent. I never heard any soldier dislike it. Lucio. I believe thee; for, I think, thou never wast where grace was said. 2 Gent. No? a dozen times at least. Lucio. In any proportion, or in any language. 1 Gent. I think, or in any religion. Lucio. Ay! why not? Grace is grace, despite of all controversy: as for example; thou thyself art a wicked villain, despite of all grace. 1 Gent. Well, there went but a pair of sheers between us.2 Lucio. I grant; as there may between the lists and the velvet: thou art the list. 1 Gent. And thou the velvet: thou art good velvet; thou art a three-pil'd piece, I warrant thee: I had as lief be a list of an English kersey, as be pil'd, as thou art pil'd, for a French velvet.3 Do speak feelingly now? Lucio. I think thou dost; and, indeed, with most painful feeling of thy speech: I will, out of thine own confession, learn to begin thy health; but, whilst I live, forget to drink after thee. 1 Gent. I think I have done myself wrong; have I not? 2 Gent. Yes, that thou hast; whether thou art tainted, or free. Lucio. Behold, behold, where madam Mitigation comes! I have purchased as many diseases under her roof, as come to 2 Gent. To what, I pray? 1 Gent. Judge. 2 Gent. To three thousand dollars a year. 1 Gent. Ay, and more. (1) Measure. (3) A jest on the loss of hair by the French disease. (2) A cut of the same cloth. 2 Gent. Besides you know, it draws something near to the speech we had to such a purpose. 1 Gent. But most of all, agreeing with the proclamation. Lucio. Away; let's go learn the truth of it. [Exeunt Lucio and Gentlemen. sweat; what with the gallows, and what with Bawd. Thus, what with the war, what with the poverty, I am custom-shrunk. How now? what's the news with you? Enter Clown. Clo. Yonder man is carried to prison. Bawd. But what's his offence? Clo. Groping for trouts in a peculiar river. Bawd. What, is there a maid with child by him? Clo. No; but there's a woman with maid by him: you have not heard of the proclamation, have you? Bawd. What proclamation, man? Clo. All houses in the suburbs of Vienna must be pluck'd down. Bawd. And what shall become of those in the city? Clo. They shall stand for seed: they had gone down too, but that a wise burgher put in for them. Bawd. But shall all our houses of resort in the suburbs be pull'd down? Clo. To the ground, mistress. Bawd. Why, here's a change, indeed, in the commonwealth! What shall become of me? Clo. Come; fear not you: good counsellors lack no clients: though you change your place, you need not change your trade; I'll be your tapster still. Courage: there will be pity taken on you: you that have worn your eyes almost out in the service, you will be considered. Bawd. What's to do here, Thomas Tapster? let's withdraw. Clo. Here comes signior Claudio, led by the pro- (4) Corona Veneris. SCENE III-The same. Enter Provost,' Clau-| Claud. I have done so, but he's not to be found. dio, Juliet, and Officers; Lucio, and two Gen-I pr'ythee, Lucio, do me this kind service: tlemen. This day my sister should the cloister enter, And there receive her approbation :5 Claud. Fellow, why dost thou show me thus to Acquaint her with the danger of my state; the world? Bear me to prison, where I am committed. But from lord Angelo by special charge. Lucio. Why, how now, Claudio? whence comes this restraint?" Claud. From too much liberty, my Lucio, liberty: As surfeit is the father of much fast, So every scope by the immoderate use Turns to restraint: our natures do pursue (Like rats that ravin2 down their proper bane,) A thirsty evil; and when we drink, we die. Lucio. If I could speak so wisely under an arrest, I would send for certain of my creditors: and yet, to say the truth, I had as lief have the foppery of freedom, as the morality of imprisonment.-What's thy offence, Claudio? Claud. What, but to speak of would offend again. Lucio. Lechery? Claud. Call it so. Prov. Away, sir; you must go. Claud. One word, good friend:-Lucio, a word with you. [Takes him aside. Lucio. A hundred, if they'll do you any good. Is lechery so look'd after? Claud. Thus stands it with me:-Upon a true contract, I got possession of Julietta's bed; You know the lady; she is fast my wife, And the new deputy now for the duke,- Which have, like unscour'd armour, hung by the Implore her, in my voice, that she make friends Lucio. I pray she may as well for the encouragement of the like, which else would stand under grievous imposition; as for the enjoying of thy life, who I would be sorry should be thus foolishly lost at a game of tick-tack. I'll to her. Claud. I thank you, good friend Lucio. Lucio. Within two hours,Claud. Come, officer, away. [Exeunt. SCENE IV-A monastery. Enter Duke and Friar Thomas. Duke. No; holy father; throw away that thought; Believe not that the dribbling dart of love Can pierce a complete bosom :7 why I desire thee To give me secret harbour, hath a purpose More grave and wrinkled than the aims and ends Of burning youth. Fri. (A man of stricture,10 and firm abstinence,) Duke. We have strict statutes, and most biting laws (The needful bits and curbs for headstrong steeds,) Which for these fourteen years we have let sleep; Even like an over-grown lion in a cave, That goes not out to prey: now, as fond fathers Fri. Duke. I do fear, too dreadful: Sith 'twas my fault to give the people scope, 'Twould be my tyranny to strike, and gall them For what I bid them do: for we bid this be done, When evil deeds have their permissive pass, And not the punishment. Therefore, indeed, my father, I have on Angelo impos'd the office; (7) Completely armed. (3) Retired. To do it slander: and to behold his sway, Francisca. Proclaim you are no less! can you so stead me, Isab. Why her unhappy brother? let me ask; Lucio. Gentle and fair, your brother kindly greets you: Not to be weary with you, he's in prison. Lucio. For that, which, if myself might be his judge, He should receive his punishment in thanks : Isab. Sir, make me not your story.2 It is true. I would not-though 'tis my familiar sin As with a saint. Isab. You do blaspheme the good, in mocking me. Lucio. Do not believe it. Fewness and truth,3 'tis thus: Your brother and his lover have embrac❜d: This is the point. The duke is very strangely gone from hence; Lucio. Has censur'd him Already; and, as I hear, the provost hath A warrant for his execution. Isab. Alas! what poor ability's in me To do him good? Lucio. Assay the power you have. Isab. My power! Alas! I'doubt,Lucio. Our doubts are traitors, And make us lose the good we oft might win, By fearing to attempt: go to lord Angelo, And let him learn to know, when maidens sue, Men give like gods; but when they weep and kneel, All their petitions are as freely theirs As they themselves would owe them. Isab. I'll see what I can do. Lucio. But speedily. Isab. I will about it straight; No longer staying but to give the mother10 Notice of my affair. I humbly thank you: Commend me to my brother: soon at night I'll send him certain word of my success. Lucio. I take my leave of you. Isab. ACT II. Good sir, adieu. [Exeunt. SCENE I-A hall in Angelo's house. Enter Angelo, Escalus, a Justice, Provost, Officers, and attendants. Ang. We must not make a scare-crow of the law, Setting it up to fear the birds of prey, And let it keep one shape, till custom make it Their perch, and not their terror. (7) Power of gaining favour. (8) Sentenced. (9) Have. (10) Abbess. (11) Scare. Escal. Ay, but yet Let us be keen, and rather cut a little, (Whom I believe to be most strait in virtue,) Ang. 'Tis one thing to be tempted, Escalus, The jury, passing on the prisoner's life, That justice seizes. What know the laws, nant,4 Escal. How know you that? Elb. My wife, sir, whom I detest12 before heaven and your honour, Escal. How! thy wife? Elb. Ay, sir; whom, I thank heaven, is an honest woman,— Escal. Dost thou detest her therefore? Elb. I say, sir, I will detest myself also, as well as she, that this house, if it be not a bawd's house, it is pity of her life, for it is a naughty house. Escal. how dost thou know that, constable? Elb. Marry, sir, by my wife; who, if she had been a woman cardinally given, might have been accused in fornication, adultery, and all uncleanliness there. Escal. By the woman's means? Elb. Ay, sir, by mistress Over-done's means: but as she spit in his face, so she defied him. Clo. Sir, if it please your honour, this is not so. Elb. Prove it before these varlets here, thou preg-honourable man, prove it. The jewel that we find, we stoop and take it, See that Claudio us all! Some rise by sin, and some by virtue fall: Enter Elbow, Froth, Clown, Officers, &c. Elb. Come, bring them away: if these be good people in a common weal,8 that do nothing but use their abuses in common houses, I know no law; bring them away. Ang. How now, sir! what's your name? and what's the matter? Elb. If it please your honour, I am the poor duke's constable, and my name is Elbow; I do lean upon justice, sir, and do bring in here before your good honour two notorious benefactors. Ang. Benefactors? Well; what benefactors are they are they not malefactors? Elb. If it please your honour, I know not well what they are but precise villains they are, that I am sure of; and void of all profanation in the world, that good Christians ought to have. Escal. This comes off well;9 here's a wise officer. Ang. Go to: what quality are they of? Elbow is your name? Why dost thou not speak, Elbow? Clo. He cannot, sir; he's out at elbow. Ang. What are you, sir? Elb. He, sir? a tapster, sir; parcel10-bawd; one that serves a bad woman; whose house, sir, was, as they say, pluck'd down in the suburbs; and now she professes a hot-house, which, I think, is a very ill house too. (1) Examine. (2) Suited. (3) Pass judgment. Escal. Do you hear how he misplaces? [To Angelo. Clo. Sir, she came in great with child; and longing (saving your honour's reverence) for stew'd prunes: sir, we had but two in the house, which at that very distant time stood, as it were, in a fruitdish, a dish of some three-pence: your honours have seen such dishes; they are not China dishes, but very good dishes. Escal. Go to, go to: no matter for the dish, sir. Clo. No, indeed, sir, not of a pin ; you are therein in the right but, to the point: as say, this mistress Elbow, being, as I say, with child, and being great belly'd, and longing, as I said, for prunes; and having but two in the dish, as I said, master Froth here, this very man, having eaten the rest, as I said, and, as I say, paying for them very honestly; -for, as you know, master Froth, I could not give you three-pence again. Froth. No, indeed. Clo. Very well you being then, if you be remember'd, cracking the stones of the foresaid prunes. Froth. Ay, so I did, indeed. Clo. Why, very well: I telling you then, if you be remember'd, that such a one, and such a one, were past cure of the thing you wot of, unless they kept very good diet, as I told you. Froth. All this is true. Escal. Come, you are a tedious fool: to the purpose.-What was done to Elbow's wife, that he hath cause to complain of? Come me to what was done to her. Clo. Sir, your honour cannot come to that yet. Clo. Sir, but you shall come to it, by your honour's leave: and I beseech you, look into master Froth here, sir; a man of fourscore pound a year; whose father died at Hallowmas :-Was't not at Hallowmas, master Froth? Froth. All-hollond13 eve. Clo. Why, very well; I hope here be truths: he, sir, sitting, as I say, in a lower14 chair, sir ;'twas in the Bunch of Grapes, where, indeed, you have a delight to sit : have you not? Froth. I have so; because it is an open room, and good for winter. (9) Well told. (10) Partly. (11) Keeps a bagnio. (12) For protest. (13) Eve of All Saints day. (14) Easy. 63201B Clo. Why, very well then;-I hope here be truths. Ang. This will last out a night in Russia, When nights are longest there: I'll take my leave, And leave you to the hearing of the cause; Hoping, you'll find good cause to whip them all. Escal. I think no less: good morrow to your lordship. [Exit Angelo. Now, sir, come on: what was done to Elbow's wife, once more? Clo. Once, sir? there was nothing done to her Escal. Ay, sir, very well. Clo. Nay, I beseech you, mark it well. Clo. Doth your honour see any harm in his face? Clo. I'll be suppos'd' upon a book, his face is the worst thing about him: good then; if his face be the worst thing about him, how could master Froth do the constable's wife any harm? I would know that of your honour. Escal. He's in the right: constable, what say you to it? Clo. Mistress Over-done. Escal. Hath she had any more than one husband? Clo. Nine, sir; Over-done by the last. Escal. Nine!-Come hither to me, master Froth. Master Froth I would not have you acquainted with tapsters; they will draw you, master Froth, and you will hang them: get you gone, and let me hear no more of you. Froth. I thank your worship: for mine own part, I never come into any room in a taphouse, but I am drawn in. Escal. Well; no more of it, master Froth: farewell. [Exit Froth.]-Come you hither to me, master tapster; what's your name, master tapster? Clo. Pompey. Escal. What else? Clo. Bum, sir. Escal. 'Troth, and your bum is the greatest thing about you; so that, in the beastilest sense, you are Pompey the great. Pompey, you are partly a bawd, Pompey, howsoever you colour it in being a tapster. Are you not? come, tell me true; it shall be the better for you. Clo. Truly, sir, I am a poor fellow, that would live. Escal. How would you live, Pompey? by being a bawd? What do you think of the trade, Pompey? is it a lawful trade? Clo. If the law would allow it, sir. Escal. But the law will not allow it, Pompey; nor it shall not be allowed in Vienna. Clo. Does your worship mean to geld and spay Escal. No, Pompey. Elb. First, an it like you, the house is a re-all the youth in the city? spected house; next, this is a respected fellow; and his mistress is a respected woman. Clo. Truly, sir, in my poor opinion, they will to't then: if your worship will take order for the drabs and the knaves, you need not to fear the var-bawds. Clo. By this hand, sir, his wife is a more respected person than any of us all. Elb. Varlet, thou liest; thou liest, wicked let: the time is yet to come, that she was ever respected with man, woman, or child. Clo. Sir, she was respected with him before he married with her. Escal. Which is the wiser here? justice, or iniquity ?2 Is this true? Escal. There are pretty orders beginning, I can tell you: it is but heading and hanging. Clo. If you head and hang all that offend that way but for ten year together, you'll be glad to give out a commission for more heads. If this law hold in Vienna ten year, I'll rent the fairest house it, after three-pence a bay: if you live to see this come to pass, say Pompey told you so. Elb. O thou caitiff! O thou varlet! O thou wick-in ed Hannibal 3 I respected with her, before I was married to her? If ever I was respected with her, Escal. Thank you, good Pompey: and, in reor she with me, let not your worship think me the quital of your prophecy, hark you,-I advise you, poor duke's officer:-Prove this, thou wicked Han- let me not find you before me again upon any comnibal, or I'll have mine action of battery on thee.plaint whatsoever, no, not for dwelling where you' Escal. If he took you a box o' the ear, you do if I do, Pompey, I shall beat you to your tent, might have your action of slander too. and prove a shrewd Cæsar to you; in plain dealElb. Marry, I thank your good worship for it:ing, Pompey, I shall have you whipt: so for this what is't your worship's pleasure I should do with time Pompey, fare you well. this wicked caitiff? Clo. I thank your worship for your good coun Escal. Truly, officer, because he hath some of-sel; but I shall follow it, as the flesh and fortune fences in him, that thou wouldst discover if thou shall better determine. couldst, let him continue in his courses, till thou know'st what they are. Elb. Marry, I thank your worship for it :--thou seest, thou wicked varlet now, what's come upon thee; thou art to continue now, thou varlet; thou art to continue. Escal. Where were you born, friend? [To Froth. Escal. Are you of fourscore pounds a year? Clo. A tapster: a poor widow's tapster. Whip me! No, no; let carman whip his jade; Escal. Come hither to me, master Elbow ; come hither, master Constable. How long have you been in this place of constable? Elb. Seven years and a half, sir. Escal. I thought, by your readiness in the office, you had continued in it some time: You say, seven years together? Elb. And a half, sir. Escal. Alas! it hath been great pains to you! They do you wrong to put you so oft upon't: Are there not men in your ward sufficient to serve it? Elb. Faith, sir, few of any wit in such matters: |